I just wanted to post a quick and simple thank you to anyone and everyone who took an interest, posted something or indeed bought my book.
I have been stunned at the support, encouragement and generosity of spirit of you all. At the risk of being sincere and serious for once, just thank you so much.
Yesterday was crazy. I just couldn’t keep up with the messages, tweets and posts, so if I missed anything from any body I apologise.
As I type, the book is number 1 on Amazon in the Family Travel category, number 4 in the Travel category and number 528 in the overall Kindle book category. It is hard to take that in really.
For those of you now reading the book, I apologise again for the grammar and spelling mistakes. Proof reading 350,000 words all on your ownsome is tough, as after a while you develop word blindness, and as I look through the book now on my tablet I see mistakes which drive me mad. I’m updating and correcting as quickly as I can and you may well get an alert from Amazon to get your hands on the update at some point.
For those who have reviewed the book, an extra thank you. Fourteen five-star reviews at the moment. Incredible.
So to stop me gushing any more I shall leave it there and get back to correcting stuff.
What is this madness? A blog from me on a Saturday? Crazy I know, but these are not normal times we live in. For a start, it feels like a Sunday due to the Goodness of the Friday I just had.
What is the reason for this earth shattering deviation from the comforting grip of routine and normality? Well, I’ll tell you.
Some weeks ago, I undertook a detailed and extensive teaser marketing campaign, as I said…
“As some sort of teaser marketing campaign, I shall …..erm…tease you by letting you know that I am working on a “secret project” at the moment and at some point soon I may reveal it to you. As an added bonus one or two of you might even give a toss.”
All none of you picked up on this, and I was inundated with absolutely no enquiries as to what I was up to. As teaser marketing campaigns go, it may not have been the most successful in the history of advertising.
Weighed down by the massive sense of expectation this campaign created, I have been working hard on this project, and can now reveal all to you.
As I said at the time, sadly it is not the annual booking of our holiday. If it were that would be the least surprising reveal since Duncan from Blue announced he was gay. It is holiday related, and is in fact the news that I am now a published author!
That sounds grander than it actually is, as frankly anyone can be a published author as long as you can figure out the labyrinth of complexity involved in Amazon’s self publishing programme. But still, published I is.
Don’t worry, I’m not trying to fund our next trip with the sales of this book. Believe me, once Amazon and the tax man have had their share I would need the population of China to buy a couple each to be able to fund more than the taxi to the airport!
It is more that I have been meaning to do this for a while now, mainly to preserve them forever on somewhere other than a certain Disney forum. Who knows when that might blow up or self-destruct in a fire-ball of reclining seats, tipping and right-wing views? If it did, all the work I had put into these would be lost and I couldn’t have that. I spend less and less time on there now, so felt that I needed to reclaim them for myself, and of course if I sell a couple (I have already bought one copy, so just one more sale to reach my target) at the same time then that would of course be lovely.
It’s a big book, and should represent decent value for the (random) price. (Amazon’s pricing engine is slightly more complex than space travel). With ten year’s worth of holidays in it, the page count is as impressive as the photo quality isn’t. Amazon’s file size restrictions mean they have to be a thumbnail of a thumbnail!
Some of the grammar and spelling will not win any awards. I have tidied them up a little, but you will still find typos and the like, but hey, that all adds to the charm, doesn’t it??
So, please tell your friends, and even your enemies that such a thing exists, and if any of you are kind enough to invest in a copy, that in itself would be incredible, but should you even enjoy it, then that is what the review system is for on Amazon so don’t be shy to add one!
So there we go, I finally got my arse in gear and created a book from stuff what I wrote. Enjoy! We all enjoyed making the holidays that are in it.
This week this post will contain none of the usual bemoanment of woes, well not for the first few paragraphs anyway! This week has seen the Williams household bestowed with a cavalcade, a cornucopia, nay, a truck load of good news and success.
So bountiful has this week been, that I may have to resort to a bullet pointed list to record them….
Emily passed her driving theory test.
Rebecca got an A in a major piece of her Drama GCSE
Louise passed the first year of her nursing course, confirming that she can move onto the second year
Emily scored a C Grade in her Film Studies AS level
I am now just concerned that I’ve missed something off this list. You will note that I added not one jot to that list. I will have to be content with my natural every day state of awesomeness.
So yay, whoop and all those celebratory exclamations.
In other important news, Emily announced to us that a major attraction had made its debut at Walt Disney World. What is this major headliner attraction that had her all exited?
Was it a multi-million pound roller coaster? Was it the fantastically themed Be Our Guest restaurant in the new Fantasy Land?
No.
It was a new Tangled themed restroom.
Don’t get it tangled!
Some of you may know that much of our WDW time can be spent in these places, hence the title of my first ever trip report, The Williams Tour of Florida Restrooms. So for some future point in time when we are able to return, this must now be crossed off our list of restrooms to visit.
To say that Emily is taking on the Disney obsession baton from me is an understatement. It is getting to the point now where she is my major source of WDW related news. From Twitter, Tumblr and YouTube, she is now a Disney knowledge sponge.
After our recent move over to Virgin for our TV services, with whom it is possible to sync your TV with your smart phone, enabling you to watch YouTube from your phone on the TV, she has done little else. Most viewings are WDW related.
So most of our Saturday evening was spent viewing a guided tour of these new loos, and less worryingly the new Be Our Guest place. Wow, what a reminder of how well Disney do this stuff. The quality and the detail of this themeing looks incredible, down to the snow falling outside of the large window.
Let ME be your guest!
Not having a trip on the horizon, I haven’t really paid much attention to the new Fantasy Land stuff. I sort of knew something was happening, but in sulky protest I have turned a cold shoulder to it. Emily to her credit is much less fickle, and is, as they say all over it or up in its grill.
For now it seems the pain of knowing she isn’t going any time soon is eased and not increased by watching it from afar. I am not so confident that I am the same way inclined.
This may be the first time that a child of mine acts more of a grown up than I. Actually, I’m sure that isn’t the case at all. Who am I trying to kid? It’s just one more step on the slow and steady journey to the girls wiping drool from my chin and changing my adult nappy. Hopefully we’ll get a chance to use the new Tangled restroom a couple of times before that happens.
This blog would be a painful place if it were merely to host an ever-increasing level of moaniness between now and August, about how we aren’t going away. It is indeed going to be that, but I feel it only right and proper to tell you.
With that disclosure done, we go on. Oh arse, that just reminds me of Reflections of Earth.
Any excuse for an ROE picture
That is the problem when you have spent every holiday since 1999 in WDW. To illustrate that point, whilst lay in bed this morning I also calculated that over the past eleven years or so, we have spent about 26 weeks in Florida. That’s more than half a year! We are practically residents. No wonder we are pining for home.
What could be similarly boring in a blog, is blogging about what you blogged about before. So we’ll do some of that too.
Last week’s blog (the doughnut burger experience) broke a few records in terms of readers. I was also really pleased to have the Teak Neighbourhood Grill spot it, and retweet it out to their followers and post it on their Facebook page.
How strange must they think we are that some seven or eight months after eating a burger in a bar in Orlando, we get together to recreate it, and then some idiot writes it all down!!
I got all sorts of reactions from all sorts of folks. People I never knew read my blog got in touch to express delight, revulsion and incredulity in fairly equal measure. As they say different strokes for different folks and all that.
So onto this week. As many of you will already be aware, Louise passed her first set of nursing exams this week. She was, as ever, convinced she wouldn’t, but in the end scored an impressively high mark. Her current placement is proving to be testing (to put it politely) but hopefully the positive news about her exam will gird her loins enough to get through it, and then enjoy the rest of the course. After this placement it is one year down, and two to go.
Whether we go to WDW or not any time soon, I am also planning our longer term trips (I am truly talented in this way, and I can have multiple trips percolating all at the same time), once she has qualified.
Not only will she earn more than she does now, but also both the girls will be out of full-time education, and we shall no longer be tied to the extortionate and sadistic mid summer flight prices. My heart is already leaping at the prospect of securing flights in the quieter periods of the year.
It will be like travelling back in time to when we first started going, and I sometimes do flight searches now for those off-peak times just to see some results come up that don’t start with a 7 or higher! It is both torture and joy combined.
Enough WDW whining I think.
We are getting used to Louise working shifts, including weekends. Yesterday it was just the girls and I, so I suppose that more or less made me “in charge”. We managed OK, and were even able to work the washer and attempt some rudimentary cleaning!
Today has been one of those lazy days, with us not getting out of bed till late morning. A delicious sausage and egg sandwich to start the day was then followed by, well, not a right lot really. I took Emily out for more driving, and she is really improving.
From the initial terror I felt sat in the passenger seat, I am now relatively relaxed when she is driving. Her overall control of the car is fine, and she can in fact actually drive now. The real work to do is around how to park, reverse and generally manoeuvre the thing at slow speed in small spaces.
Whether it is the heart wrenching fear and angst of their first day at nursery, their terrifying start at secondary school or them handling half a ton of metal at high-speed, they are just one long set of woe, worry and mietheration. The trick is recognising that this is all part of that often quoted Circle of Life, and trying to enjoy the ride, rather than shouting out STOP as she brings the car to halt seven inches short of that lamp-post as she parks the car up back at home. It is also important to recognise and appreciate that they are worth it too.
I’ll try harder next time, but I’m not that hopeful.
I shall leave you with a new picture of Oli, taken by Emily. For no other reason than I love it….
Staring down the barrel of our first non WDW year since sometime around 2001, the pain is becoming unbearable. So much so that on Friday afternoon in a quiet moment at work, I glanced back through the photos on my phone, and eventually came to the ones taken last August in Florida.
I felt the urge to tweet a photo of the now infamous Donut Burger from the Teak Neighbourhood Grill, stating how much I missed it. A retweet from Emily and a brief Twitter conversation with the sister-in-law led us to a Saturday night based around re-creating the dish here in the UK.
So between us we procured the required ingredients, and I kicked off the cooking.
A good start
In terms of ingredients, I suppose I should list what you might need, but to be honest it is fairly obvious. Anyway, we had ten diners and used –
Two dozen glazed Krispy Kreme doughnuts.
Twelve good quality beef burgers
Some maple cured bacon
Cheese
Chilli Fries (made by sister-in-law)
A selection of mustards, ketchup, BBQ sauce and mayo to suit all tastes
The burgers said to fry them, so I did.
Fry my pretties
With the bacon under the grill, as soon as stuff was ready I started to plate up. Before I did I quickly melted the cheese on top of each burger. Plating up is a bit messy, as the sugar glaze stuff gets everywhere!!
I had been afraid that the finished article would bear no resemblance to the real deal over in Florida, but I was pretty chuffed to be honest. To be fair, it isn’t the most technical of dishes!
Tower of PowerGlazed goodness
Amongst the diners present, only Emily and I had actually eaten the real thing back in August, so I had no idea what sort of reaction there would be. Our other guests had been to Teak during their recent Florida trip just after Christmas, but had different dishes. My brother had tried (and failed) to polish off the Heart A-Teak.
Be afraid!
I needn’t have worried. Everyone seemed to lap it up!!
Oh Brother!
That expression is I think a mix of disbelief and joy!!
Rebecca and her boyfriend Tom were equally impressed. Tom is a fitness freak so I wasn’t sure how he’d react, but he wolfed it down. That burger, along with the chocolate cake and custard to follow rid him of his ugly six-pack in one go!
Don’t interrupt my burger
Emily’s aversion to photos knows no end, similarly her love for this dish.
Too late
Nephew Jack had necked the lot by the time I had got to him. I took that as a good sign.
My Precious!!!
Niece Sarah was also won over!!
By this time plates were becoming clean and I had spent enough time snapping and I needed to eat my own!!
That didn’t take long, and with a choice of New York Cheesecake or Hot Fudge Chocolate Cake for “afters” everyone was soon suitably immobile, tired and I think happy.
Full of food and topped up with wine and beer we discussed how we should open an American inspired restaurant, with dishes like these, the obligatory eating challenge, and an old-fashioned traditional ice cream and American soda bar.
We had loads of great ideas, and between us probably enough knowledge and business sense. Alas, we lack the couple of hundred grand to get it going so instead we had another beer and finished off the wine.
So, in an attempt to fight off the lack of America blues I have managed to replicate that “none of my clothes fit” fear for my next day at work by consuming a ridonculous amount of calories. We also have no money, so we can almost pretend that we’ve just got back from Florida. Can’t we?
A couple of tweets and Facebook posts of said burgers drew a wide range of comments. All I will say is that those expressing revulsion, concern or sheer horror…..like all things in life, don’t knock it until you’ve tried it.
If any of you are heading to Florida soon, give the Teak a try, and tell them I sent you. Whether you have or indeed like the Donut burger, you’ll have a good time anyway.
Fear not, there shall be no political ranting this week. I finished work last Tuesday, and so I am almost at the stage where I am starting to relax a bit. It does usually take me those few days to shed the grinding routine from my system, and this was evidenced by me not getting out of bed this morning until 10.40!! That is testimony not just to my relaxed state but also to the very impressive performance of my prostate. That’s what I call bladder control! Take that middle age!
I have spent my days being busy but in a good way…..mainly. I’ve done a couple of decent walks with Oli, and done some of those long overdue niggling jobs around the house. I am not one to spare you from detail, so these have involved changing both toilet seats in the house and replacing about twenty-six bulbs that were out. I had not planned to replace both toilet seats, however having selected a new one for the main loo all by myself, as soon as it was fitted it became quite clear that it was not correct. Well, so Louise told me anyway. What is wrong with a bright white toilet seat on a cream toilet I do not know. Anyway, to save any tears (mine) I allowed Louise to go and choose another one, and I retired the bright white one to the en suite, where it still looks a bit odd, but no-one sees that other than mine and Louise’s under parts.
I have also shampooed our carpets. Really, how do you live with the level of excitement in these blog posts? Loo seats and carpet cleaning in one week must have you on the edge of sleep.
Christmas wise, I wisely secured a delivery slot with Asda some weeks ago, and this duly turned up on Saturday. The delivery driver had the haunted look of someone who had about a dozen similar mammoth deliveries to get through that day. Having spent an enormous amount I was somewhat aghast and let down to realise when he’d left that we had no actual food.
We have lots of booze, plenty of stuff for Christmas day but very little actual day-to-day stuff. So this morning I had to walk up to the local Co-op and do a mini shop just so we can eat before the big day. It sort of took the shine off my smugness at being so organised for once.
We are hosting this year, however, the burden is somewhat reduced as everyone involved is pitching in to cook various elements of the food required. So the more people we invite the less we have to do. If we get a few more round I only have to open the peanuts and buy a cheese board and we’re away!
One distinct advantage of living next door to my Mum & Dad is that we can devise a way to seat all twelve of us. We are going to dismantle their dining room table and bring it into our house. With a few emergency chairs and sitting close together we should be OK.
I’m sure you like us are plagued with the fear of having forgotten something key, and therefore disappointing someone who fancies a glace cherry. Oh bugger, we don’t have any glace cherries.
Thinking about it, should any of our guests require such a thing, I can live with it, as most of them jet off to Florida two days later. That’s right, my brother, his three kids (plus a couple of their partners) and my Mum & Dad are spending ten days there, and I don’t mind a bit. Giving dining recommendations through gritted teeth is perfectly normal isn’t it?
Should you all wish to club together and fund us to join them, call my boss and Louise’s University placement and secure the required time off, kennel the dog and cats and pack, then that would be a real nice xmas treat and no mistake!
Instead, I shall spend the remainder of my xmas hols in the elasticated pants, staying in very close proximity to the TV and Xbox, and determined to clear the cupboards in readiness for the inevitable new year diet. I am not in any way ready though for the already recorded onslaught of “New Year, New You” nonsense. You just know there will be the normal parade of leotard clad minor celebs trying to fool you into thinking their DVD will get you thin, when in reality they have an eating disorder and a history of surgical procedures to thank.
Just as I start to think I a recovering from post WDW blues, someone does something which brings all those thoughts and longings back.
Twitter is a cruel mistress
As much as I do feel honoured that the chap or chapess who runs the Applebees twitter account found me and decided I was worthy of a follow, as I read that email it hurt.
There were two reasons for this. Firstly it was 4.43am. I was just about to set off down south to get to Head Office for a couple of days, but secondly and mainly it reminded me that the joys of an Ultimate Trio at an Applebees was so beyond my reach that the pain was tangible.
I suspect it is more likely that Applebees will open up some UK branches before we get to go back. That’s right, I am declaring right here, as is my annual tradition, that I don’t think we’ll be back next year. The new house demands attention like a naughty toddler, and more than that, it demands whatever disposable income we are likely to stumble across.
I won’t go on about it, as we all know that isn’t the first time I have been here, so we’ll leave it there and wait and see. It is Emily’s 18th next July, and she has been less than subtle in declaring where she wants to be for it, but that doesn’t magic up the multiple thousands of pounds required, regardless of the amount of guilt I would feel if we didn’t do something special for her.
In real world matters, Louise’s back is improving, thanks to some physio and lots of medication. She should be returning to her hospital placement tomorrow which is excellent news. The physio seems to think that the back problems are caused by a long-standing ankle problem which is forcing Louise to walk in a way that compensates for the pain she feels, and this in turn throws her pelvis and back out of kilter, and leads to her back “going” from time to time. So the end game is to resolve the ankle thing.
The first step (pun intended) in this process is naturally to throw away the £50 trainers she has had for a few weeks and buy some new ones which will be better suited to her needs. Smashing. Should anyone want a pair of black Sketchers that have been worn about six times do let me know. Best price guaranteed!
With Louise mobile again, I am hopeful that we will tonight complete a long-held ambition to enjoy a night with a Bat Man costume in a darkened room. This is not a Shades of Grey type reference, more a 50 pounds of Pick n Mix reference as we are heading for the cinema. Our local Cineworld is still showing the Dark Knight film, despite the fact it has been out since July, and having heard nothing but good things I intend to snack up, settle down and slob out for a couple of hours.
Next week sees me in Manchester, Marlow and London, none of which have an Applebees and this is something I am struggling to come to terms with.
However, my pain is but a low throb compared to the white-hot burning heat of a post WDW depression that @tweetwizzo is feeling right about now, having recently landed back in the UK. He’ll be starting his trip report soon so look out for it. At the rate I am getting through mine, not only will he finish his before me, he will probably have had another holiday too.
Mind you, neither of us seem to be enduring a lack of mojo on a scale to compare with Gordon (The_Finkelstein) who hasn’t been seen much since his return back in the early days of summer. I am thinking of hosting a 24 hour telethon appeal to get him the support he needs in these tough times.
Right, I must go. The X Factor repeat has come on the telly so I need to go and throw it out of the window.
Apologies for blogless Sunday, and this is just a very quick post to confirm that we have indeed made it back home in more or less one piece.
There is perhaps a little more of me sat typing this than typed the last blog update, but such are the perils of a Florida holiday and I am classing every extra pound as a badge of honour for our latest adventure.
The trip report has started, but only just, and Day One, can be found over at the Dibb. Day Two has not yet been started but I hope to get to it this week. Work has had me all over the place since getting back, both mentally and physically. I’m away again Tuesday evening, and this, as it did last week, should give me the time to get it done. There is little else to do in the bustling Metropolis of Marlow (no offence Marlowians).
We are all back into our respective routines, me as I said above, right in the deep end of a load of new work stuff on my return, the girls into their own important school and college years (we’ll have one doing GCSEs and one doing A levels this year!), and Louise’s nursing course now has her in her placement doing some actual nursing.
She’s doing shifts and all sorts, and working hard, as nurses do, but she is enjoying it which is the main thing.
I won’t steal any of my own thunder by talking about the holidays, but I will give you this photo, as I think it made it to Facebook via Emily anyway.
Don’t knock it till you try it!
This was without doubt the tastiest thing Emily and I ate all holiday. Honestly. Right there on that plate are about half the pounds I gained! I shall leave the rest of the story to the trip report, and await the varied comments from “Yum” to “Vomit”.
Normal service next Sunday hopefully, but I shall keep bloggage light so that I can spend the time getting more days done.
I should also encourage anyone who doesn’t already to follow Wizzo from the Dibb, as he is about to embark on what I think is his sixth trip in as many months…something like that anyway. @Tweetwizzo is what you need if you twitter, and I’m sure he will be treating us to food porn and extreme gloating pretty much from Wednesday onwards, and I don’t hold it against him one bit!
So the build up to this trip continues to be anything but smooth.
I just wanted to post a quick update to let you know that our travelling party is down to four now. Unfortunately, my Mum & Dad won’t be coming along as planned due to illness.
Last week they were away in France, and had to fly home early as my Mum was not well at all. To cut a very long story short, she has since been admitted to hospital with what is suspected kidney stones, but no-one is sure of the diagnosis as yet.
We feel gutted for them, as they were so looking forward to going again, and it is a cruel twist of fate to suffer illnes in the few weeks of the year when holidays are planned. It has put a bit of a dampner on the final few days of countdown, and it is hard to see the look of dissapointment and upset on their faces now that we are about to leave.
I know that they will want us to go and have a fab time, so we’ll try our best to not let this take anything away from the trip. My Dad is busily filling out insurance forms, and hopefully he will get back the vast majority of what he has paid out.
With all the “stuff” that we’ve been through in the build up to this holiday it surely is now bound to be the best holiday to be had ever in the history of holidaydom! Here’s hoping.
We’ve changed a bit of the plan in light of this, mainly the fact that we are now doing Airport parking rather than a mini bus, being only the four of us now. I got a good deal (I think) with a meet and greet service at the Terminal kerbside for £44. However, I had forgotten that we’d changed cars recently to much smaller models, and now we’ll be driving to the airport with kids and suitcases sellotaped to the roof. I know I’ll have a seat though so all is well.
So there we are. Surely that is it. There can be nothing else in our way now. I will just be so relieved to finally get going.
Watch out for the occasional update via the usual media, otherwise we’ll see you in September. Onwards!
So dear readers this looks like the last blog before we embark on our latest American adventure. This time next week, we shall be airborne over lots of water, full of barely edible food, anticipation and good spirits.
This will not be new news to you unless this is the first time you have stumbled this way. Certainly if you have the misfortune to encounter any of my social media outpourings, then surely by now you will be sick to the back teeth of smug countdown tweets and over excited nonsense.
As most of you will know, the smaller the countdown gets, the slower time goes by. The last month has been turgid, and now with just a week to go, it stretches out ahead of me like an endless runway of meh.
I don’t know if this is just us, but when we are deciding whether or not to book these holidays, we tend to tell lies to ourselves, such as, we won’t need to spend a fortune on holiday clothes, and we’ll just make do with that we have.
If I lived with three men, rather than three females then this may be doable. It would also be a weird type of family unit! So over the last few days we have been ticking off the essentials of the items required for such a trip.
Blinded by the light
Of course for me this must mean the purchase of some trainers that can be seen from space. I am complete. Other than that though I shall be rocking the same holiday clothes that I have enjoyed for the past decade or so. Why change a classic look?
We’ve done a couple of Trafford Centre trips to get the girls sorted with their staple items of denim shorts and T-shirts. In my next life I am going to be a denim short seller…seriously how much????
Rebecca is so excited that she has more or less packed with a full week to go.
A case of premature packing
Whilst I was taking that picture of Rebecca’s case in her room, I noticed some of the snaps she has on her shelves, and it brought home just how much history we have with these holidays, and what a massive part the place has played in our lives. I can only imagine what that’s like for the girls as it is all they have known really.
I took some pictures of the pictures, so apologies for the quality.
A big PoohWho knows which is which?
This next one is (I think) one of the earliest we have, from 1999, when Rebecca was just two.
I think I’d been drinking
We shall not be attempting a reconstruction of this photo this year!!
So many memories, and it is about this time in the countdown that I try to remind myself to enjoy every second. Even the boring bits like the flight. Who knows what memories we will make this time, and which of those will stick with us for the years to come.
Each year is different with the girls at different stages of course. As young adults now, I look back on memories of them in the photos above with great fondness. The strollers, the extortionate and endless Princess dresses we bought them, and their wide-eyed delight at every character encounter.
We’ve worked so hard for this trip in so many ways, and in equally as many ways we shouldn’t be going. We booked in a rush of blood and crossed fingers, and events have done their best to conspire against us at every turn.
We have dodged every one as best we can, and still we sit here, seven days away from departure still able to go, and determined to have a bloody good time. What happens when we get back….well we’ll deal with that then I suppose. I’ve been working on something that may make those long winter months and credit card bills less depressing, but more of that some other time.
I had a thought earlier this weekend, caught up in the euphoria of Mo Farrah’s incredible race and second gold medal. The country is currently experiencing some of the atmosphere and magic that us Disney idiots revel in. The shared and overwhelming feelings created by an event like this, the massive crowds, the shared focal point of everyone’s attention and goodwill, is much of what the crowds leaving Magic Kingdom after Wishes will feel. When you see photos of a line of Police doing the “Mobot” as the crowds leave is the equivalent of seeing the Cast Members waving you goodnight as you follow the crowds out towards the monorail.
Close your eyes, imagine the perfect heat of an Orlando night, the tiredness in your legs from a full day of touring, and that post Wishes lump in your throat as the perfect background music carries you on a cloud to your exit plan of choice.
Then, the endless twinkling magic of the resorts through windows as you speed past them on the monorail with *that* voice telling you what you know already about staying clear of the doors and which resort you are approaching.
These are a few of my favourite things.
I apologise for the cloying over sentimental tosh, but you will have to forgive me. I am a week away from a trip, not knowing if it may be the last for some time, and I intend to eek every last drop from it, and then some.
Before that of course I have to endure every painful moment of five endless days at work. It appears insurmountable from here, but I’m sure somehow it will pass. Won’t it?
So from a blog perspective I shall see you on the other side, as I cannot imagine updating this whilst over there. We probably will have a laptop with us, but I think the most I will muster is an odd tweet or Facebook update just to remind everyone where we are and where they aren’t. It pleases me.
Now, I have to go and be over excited, over emotional and overweight somewhere else. In this state, the Olympics closing ceremony may well have me in tears, but I suspect that will be for the wrong reasons when the Spice Girls take to the stage. Watching them? I won’t Wannabe!
It is a delight and a relief to finally have it done, as it means that Emily can fully move in at last, but more than that, it means I don’t have to do any more work on it.
I took some before photos a few weeks ago, but to be honest, they were sort of half way through as we had already spent a few weeks in demo mode. You can scroll back to find them I’m sure. Either way, the room was a mess. However, now it is habitable again, probably for the first time in a few decades, and Emily moved in on Tuesday once the carpet was in.
This was the day it wasn’t rainingStop and stairThe walk in wardrobeThere’s a teenager in there somewhereKit and KaboodleBloody cat!
We had a slight false start (or end) with the carpet folk who did a bit of a shoddy job first time round, and it took me in my sternest grown up voice to get them back and sort it out. Grrrr!
We’ve had a bit of a busy week aside from the completion of Emily’s room. On Friday it was our wedding anniversary. Sixteen years this time around. Those quick of maths will have worked out that Emily just turned seventeen, so we will surely burn in hell for doing things the wrong way round!
Being in “skint before holiday” mode we didn’t do much to commemorate the day to be honest. We just went to Pizza Hut with the kids on Friday evening for a very underwhelming dining experience. Not to worry, it reminded us how good the dining will be in a couple of weeks time.
In other news, Louise’s Mum has been in hospital for an operation, which seems to have gone well, and she is now home resting up. Weirdly they operated on Saturday. Maybe they have extended their opening hours for the Olympics like the supermarkets?
This week has also seen Emily and myself survive a high-speed car crash! I took her out on Saturday evening for a practice following her second lesson. She somehow managed to find the only lamp-post in the empty car park we were in, and like some sort of light seeking missile, jammed the front of the car right into it. Apparently the brake and clutch are very confusing when you first start driving. Thankfully, there are no visible signs of damage, and the car is OK too!
Despite finishing the loft, DIY was still unavoidable over the weekend, with a bathroom that needed painting. Well, it needed finishing as Louise had started it, knowing that I would not be able to pee in peace knowing it was half done. On top of that we had to do some floor tiling in the kitchen. I have to admit to doing the handing of stuff to Dad approach on this one.
Add a couple of tip trips, and there you have what has been a fairly typical weekend since the move.
Oli was not to be kept out of the headlines, with an injury all of his own. Getting ready for work on Monday, I noticed he was hopping about on three legs. I ignored him hopeful that he’d got those post poo pins and needles that you can sometimes get if you take too long over your business. Alas, no. Louise confirmed later that morning that he was still limping, and they were off to the vets. Only one word springs to mind in that scenario. Kerching. They did not let me down.
Despite the huge hole in the already swiss cheese like bank account, luckily Oli was quickly back on form later that day, despite what was diagnosed as a fractured toe.
Sometimes, I think I’m living in a very low-budget soap opera with writers that need sacking.
Speaking of soap operas. No writer of one of those could have put together the script that we all witnessed on Saturday night. I speak of course of the Olympics. Wow, what a night. It is rare that a sporting occasion grasps our whole family, but we all sat glued to the action, shouting them on. By the time we got to Mo Farah’s race we were truly hooked, and absolutely blown away by his incredible performance. Well done to all who are making this summer memorable despite the crappiest of weather.
So now we turn to the inevitable countdown ramblings. We now enter those funny last two weeks before departure. I want to wish them away with all my being, but I know that these next two weeks are the same duration as the actual holiday, so as quick as these go, I would hope the holiday goes too. If only.
Several times through the day today we have been doing the “this time in two weeks we will be……” thing. In fact, right now, we will be at Atlanta airport waiting to board our second flight down to Orlando. I’ll have put on my first half stone just with the airport Starbucks and eating the kid’s in flight meals for them before cracking open the three pounds of sweets and Pringles. I’ll be on Diet Coke though.
Until that time comes around there is a fair amount of work enduring to do, no doubt more DIY and tippage, and the usual last-minute prep to go through. I shall really try to enjoy all of that as much as possible, as heaven knows when it might come around again.
This evening whilst doing her homework, (yes I too am astounded that she has given it any thought before the last of the holidays) Rebecca came down stairs with a smoking laptop. Not literally, but it had a blue screen of death. I have since spent the last few hours wrestling with it. Admitting defeat I had to rescue the files we needed off it, and go for a full wipe and restore. It took an age, but I sit typing on it again now resplendent in my own IT excellence. It is the equivalent of returning to the cave dragging a mammoth!
So with manhood proven, I’m off to go and give someone a gun show, and watch the rest of the Olympics. *flexes muscles and gives manly look*.
Excitement in the Williams household is reaching epic proportions. We probably say this every year, but we are definitely in the space of really NEEDING this holiday.
The trials and tribulations of this year so far are well documented here, and they have taken their toll for sure. Even the girls seem much more excited than usual. Rebecca especially, who most years can seem quite cool about “another” holiday, tells me most days that she cannot wait to go.
Emily is of course a confirmed addict, and proved the point again by spending her evening yesterday watching You Tube videos of Disney Parks. Yes, she even cried at the Beauty and the Beast show. She is beyond excited.
I don’t need to tell you how I feel. Apart from tired, you can pretty much guess how I am feeling right about now. The yearning is becoming an actual physical pain.
With pay-day happening this week, the final bits of the planning were completed this week. Firstly, park tickets. I’d always planned to get a 14 day Ultimate, as of course the rule this year is Disney first,second, and last. We tried the no hopper Magic Your Way things a couple of years ago, and if you are doing other parks as well, they can work well, and certainly present a saving, but I absolutely want the flexibility this year of being able to hop, and go for part days.
This plan did not stop me from spending an unhealthy amount of time researching things just to make sure that I could not somehow find park tickets for a tenner. I couldn’t, and therefore went ahead and bought them from Florida Escapes. They say they will arrive within 18 days, which is handy as the countdown stands at 21 currently.
With those in the metaphorical bag, I moved on to the dollars. We always have a card or two along for company anyway, but unlike in the UK, I do like to carry cash too. I did the Money Saving Expert thing to find the best deals. They have a calculator that works out not only the best rate, but the best overall deal once take everything into account like delivery charges.
So despite only ordering them on Friday, they arrived Saturday morning, and I spent a few moments alone with them, having a sniff and a feel. Yes that is incredibly sad, what of it?
So we’re ready, in fact more than ready. For the next three weeks or so, I’m just going to sit on my packed case by the front door waiting for the taxi.
Along with that good stuff, Friday brought Emily back to us, courtesy of Easyjet. We’d missed her, and she was honest enough to admit she’d missed us too. She was suitably brown, and tired, and glad that it was only for a week. As much as she likes her friend, a week of non stop time together is very different to a few hours at college.
I can summarise my week’s other activities in one word….painting. Every evening and most of the weekend have seen us get Emily’s room almost ready for the carpet which we have ordered to come on Tuesday. I never want to see a roller again. I know the room is big, but every time we thought we’d finished we spotted another bit that mocked us with its unpaintedness, or needed a second coat.
Tomorrow, we just need to finish off the white gloss bits, which I’m hopeful Louise and my Dad will have under control by the time I get back from work. If I drive home slowly enough I’m sure they will.
Pictures will be blogged next week, and if anyone sees that I’ve missed a bit, please feel free to keep it to yourself. I intend to burn the decorating implements once we’re done.
I haven’t posted a video here for a while so just to prove I haven’t forgotten how to you can have this one. It is Oli and me play fighting. The teeth and pain are real, and the noise he makes is very silly.
Having now seen my incredible media skills, I cannot let this week go by without doffing my cap to every single person involved in the opening ceremony for the Olympics. I’ll be honest, I was concerned beforehand that we may look a little stupid if we did not deliver something close to our predecessors. Knowing that we were starting the whole thing with sheep and people cutting wheat, you can appreciate my lack of confidence.
Rings of Fire
I have never been more wrong. I loved every minute of it, and was blown away by the whole thing. I even stayed up to watch all 4000 teams enter the stadium, and unlike nearly everyone else I didn’t mind McCartney at the end either. Of course he isn’t what he was, and the voice isn’t there any more, but if any other country had produced The Beatles, and had one or two still alive, you can bet they would have used them too. The alternative was probably Elton John or Coldplay so all in all, I thought it was a decent call.
Danny Boyle did a wonderful job, in taking what could have been (to paraphrase the Muppets) a glorious five hour tribute to all countries but mainly the United Kingdom, and making it cool. As Rebecca would say, he put a banging donk on it. I think that is a positive thing.
Right, I’m off to stare at the clock for the next twenty odd days.
Let us take a moment of reflection. Let us bow our heads and send all of our thoughts and best wishes to someone who needs all of us to support him at this awful time.
Gordon’s back off holiday!
It will be a familiar feeling to most of you reading this, but nothing can prepare you for the full unadulterated horror of that immediate and jarring return to reality.
Judging by the tweetage live from WDW, the times had by the McBains were tremendous and that of course multiplies the horror once back in the UK. I think I say this after every trip, but the UK appears to be in black and white when compared to the multi coloured razzle dazzle of the US. I know of course that spending a holiday in and around WDW, the vacation capital of the word, is not a fair comparison to flying back into Manchester, which of course isn’t, but still this is real pain.
It is the eternal problem. You book a holiday, and the days before departure seem endless. You wish them away, desperate to set off into the magic. Alas, not only do the actual days of the holiday go at normal speed, they whizz past in record time, seemingly like some end of life experience, and before you know it, you are sat on your couch staring at cases that need unpacking and a fridge that needs filling.
I am therefore trying very hard to relish these last few weeks of our countdown, whilst at the same time, counting every second.
To luxuriate in every element of the planning is the key. I spend money all the time, certainly at the moment, with us discovering that our new house and its contents has been held together by sellotape and string, the outflowing of cash if like a fiscal diarrhea. I can tell you that I do not enjoy the spending of one penny. However, when it comes to holiday related stuff, I can actually take pleasure in laying out cash.
This week’s activity has been the booking of our round of golf. It took a great deal of research, again, enjoyable, and after some consultation with my golf partners (Dad and Steve), we have a tee time of 9.10am on the 24th of August. Putting a small dent in a credit card was strangely pleasurable.
Aptly named
That has been it holiday planning wise this week as we are pretty much done. We are approaching the ticket time, where I have to get those booked, and finally wrestle every last cent out of the dollar purchase. I shall savour both.
Back in the real world, Rebecca completed her second week of work experience at a local nursery (child, not plant), and promptly caught an awful cold which sees her currently on the couch watching crap telly. Emily’s provisional driving licence turned up (the paper bit anyway), and more stuff broke in the house.
The weekend has been a little testing to be honest. Saturday saw me punished for my speeding crimes reported some weeks ago. I had to drive to Mold. No, that wasn’t the punishment!! I attended my speed awareness course. I promise I shall never speed again if it means sitting through another four hours of that.
Not my actual course
Due to the aforementioned breakage of stuff, I had ordered our new fridge yesterday to replace the two integrated ones that were, well pretty much broken. I checked the website last night, and it said that delivery would occur between……6.29am and 10.29am. Yep, you read that right. So I was up at 6am. To make way for the new fridge, I had to demolish the integrated unit things housing the fridges, and then get them outside ready to be recycled.
With help from my Dad, this next door neighbour thing has its benefits, we eventually wrestled the bloody thing into bits and out of the house. You will of course have guessed that the new fridge turned up at 10.27am.
It was installed quickly, and that just left me and my Dad to drive around and try to find matching tiles to the ones that should have been underneath the old fridge units but weren’t. No problem, as they can only have been twenty years old!
Two stops later, and we had a sort of match, or close enough for tiles that will be 90% hidden under the fridge. We get them on Wednesday.
A big shop later, and I was back home and ready for bed. It was 3pm.
The loft (almost Emily’s bedroom) is approaching completion, from the builder’s point of view anyway. It is more or less fully plastered now and we are hoping that a couple of days more work from them next week should see us decorating….for about six weeks. The one good thing about gutting that room and starting from scratch is that we’ll know that nothing can break in there. The room will be unique in that respect.
Also please, remember to send Gordon and his family all your support at this very difficult time. I’m sure he will also enjoy you all constantly asking when Day 1 on the trip report will be done. It won’t be long until that is us, and probably most of the readers of this bloggage.
With that in mind, I will just drop in that we go in 35 days!! Ave it!!
With another quiet uneventful week behind us, here we are at blog time once again.
Last week of course meant starting a new job. As much as I was happy to be able to do exactly that, it did not lessen the usual misgivings and apprehension that something like this always brings, even when you’ve been working for (quickly does the maths) 25 years without a break. Wow, I am very old.
Week one went OK. I didn’t do a great deal that I could feel enormously proud of, unless you count setting up my laptop, finding the toilets and making the odd brew. I am in the “too new to be useful” phase, which I hope will not last long. I am expecting to be launched into the deep end from tomorrow, which is preferred to sitting reading induction material!
Typically, since starting the new job, every call I’ve had has been from someone trying to talk to me about a job for which “I am absolutely perfect”. Such is life, and it does take a fair amount of will power to tell them I am off the market, and not be tempted to see if the grass on offer is any greener. I have so far managed to be strong.
With some sort of normality restored, I have thrown myself wherever possible into preparations for our upcoming holiday. Have I mentioned that we’re going away?
Last week that took the shape of completing our ESTAs. I resisted the urge to moan about the $14 charge much as my natural instinct was to do so. Rationally, in the scheme of a holiday costing multiple thousands of pounds, it does seem a little odd to moan about a tenner each to get into the country. Again, I managed to remain strong.
With the four of us assured entry into the US (their economy could not cope with our absence), I talked my Dad through the online process and was relieved to know that we are all allowed to go! So onto matters more fun. I found my way to the relevant website to book us tickets for the Daytona Cubs. With relevant discounts from $7 to $6 for seniors and children, the bill for that evening came out at around £30.
Swing batter, batter, swing.
I am really looking forward to that, especially with Mum and Dad in tow as they have not seen live baseball since the 1980s, when we saw a college game at Boardwalk and Baseball.
These types of activities are some of the few that I enjoy spending money on!
So after my first four days in work, I headed home looking forward to a nice relaxing weekend with my feet up. You really should know better than that. Saturday meant an all out attack on the loft (soon to be Emily’s bedroom). The task was so huge that we gladly accepted the offer of help from my brother and sister-in-law. We were so glad of that help, as the task was more vast than we had imagined.
We thought we’d now just be stripping off the sixty year old wallpaper. For this reason we had secured the services of two strippers. They got very steamy for hours on end, and they quickly removed the necessary items to our satisfaction.
This stripping was the main task, but the real work ( you can guess which the men did!!) was in cutting up and transporting the carpet down two flights of stairs, along with endless bags of crap. Heavy crap too, as most of them contained the walls knocked down last week. We filled a skip and the cavernous back of the Mondeo and still had stuff to get rid of.
However, a long, long, hard day ended with the job done. It also ended with four very tired, stiff and sore individuals. After a gap filled with showers and a nap or two, we reconvened at our house where I prepared a delightful meal of Mango Chicken. We had made this many years ago, but couldn’t find the recipe. Despite having to guess at most of the ingredients and the cooking methods, it turned out very well. Well done me.
We spent the evening absolutely not moving and watching a film whilst our every muscle stiffened up to the point of rigamortis. The beer and wine went some way to lessening the pain.
The evening did not involve the strippers in any way. I was in no fit state anyway.
Sunday surely must have brought hours of endless relaxing? Not quite. A small lie in until around 9am was followed by a tidy up of last night’s meal, and some general faffery until we set off for the bed shop. You may recall we have a bed for the making of the magic? Well, Louise (Princess and the pea) Williams tells me the mattress is too hard.
The terms of the purchase allow us 40 nights within which to swap out the mattress, so this is what we are doing. Louise lay down on a few mattresses and settled on one that should fit the bill. I nodded in the appropriate place, as I’m pretty sure I will be able to sleep on it.
A big shop later, and I was back home for lunch. Following the collection of Louise’s new car last week, I had gotten to thinking about getting one for myself. Now, I love my Mondeo and it has been an excellent car, but I made the fatal mistake of calculating what the pleasure of driving it costs me over a year. Wow. Safe to say it is a holiday’s worth.
99% of the time, I am sat in it all on my own so it’s sprawling expanse is largely wasted. To cut a long story short, we went back the garage this afternoon and picked out one for me. Between the two cars, we should be saving a whole chunk of cash every month.
Whether it is my recent stressful job situation, and brush with financial meltdown or a subliminal desire to help us get to WDW in future years I don’t know, but I just could not justify the huge wads of cash leaving the bank every month for something I queue up in twice a day.
Why do they put the wrong names over the actors?
Another factor maybe that we have found that our new house may well have been featured into that film The Money Pit. We were perhaps a little naive to think that a house of this age, bought from someone in the latter years of their life would be anything but riddled with nasty surprises. The outlay on new bulbs alone would bring Greece to its knees, as every single light fitting in the house has at least one bulb that needs replacing.
Add to that all the lovely appliances we were left. Every one of which have decided now to give up the pretense of working that they fooled us with last week and give up the ghost. It would seem that we are going to have to systematically replace every single thing in the house. However, not until I have had my bloody holiday!
Last week alone we have had issue with the cooker, dishwasher, fridges and the windows. The latter being my favourite. The previous owner had misplaced the keys to all the windows, so we enjoyed a lovely sauna at night, unable to get any fresh air in. Luckily a locksmith was able to locate a key that would work, and for another chunk of money, we can breathe again.
On our return from the garage this afternoon, Rebecca has bathed Oli, and Louise is making us a chilli for tea. (Top tip from Louise, do not put your finger up your nose after chopping Chillis). Time to relax now and enjoy the weekend! Oh bugger, it’s Monday in a few hours.
There’s a reason that I don’t do a job that involves manual labour. Well, there may be a few reasons, but the main one is that I’d be dead by Wednesday of the first week.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve put a hell of a shift in this weekend moving stuff and boxes, and more stuff, and oh, so that’s where that went to. Two full days of non stop manual labour and my body is literally rebelling. At around lunch time today still with endless amounts to move, my system started to go into shutdown mode. I finally understood the phrase being out on your feet.
To stave off these feelings I have of course been shoving as many calories down my throat as I’ve been able to, starting this morning with a traditional Father’s Day breakfast.
I had to wait a little while, as I was up at 6.30. Oli checked to see if I was awake at that time by jabbing his huge wet nose into my forehead a dozen times, and by that time, yes, I was awake. I stumbled out of the bedroom into the hall (don’t forget, we are in the ex-garage downstairs) and saw what looked like a scene from Alien.
After a hard day’s work yesterday, my Mum & Dad treated us all to a massive Chinese takeaway at their house, mainly as we were too weak to even open the fridge. On the menu were spare ribs, and Oli partook in about two dozen too many, and this led to him revisiting them all over the floor. Just as I was finishing the mop up operation, Louise wandered in saying she’d do it and I should go to bed. Yep, that’s right, just as I was finishing!!
Once awake, the brain was whirring, and sleep was long since gone. I was up comparing car insurance by 7am! Some hours later, the girls made it downstairs with their eyes almost fully open, and wished me a Happy Father’s Day, and thrust a Cinderella gift bag at me. Inside were a card, and my present, a T-shirt, with the phrase Grouch Potato on it. I didn’t even think to object. After a few more minutes of banging and clattering, I was presented with a breakfast fit for a King. Waffles, squirty cream and strawberries. No full English, as I used to get when they were too young to do it themselves and Louise would do the honours. Left to their own devices, operating the microwave and the can of cream is the full extent of their culinary skills.
It was delicious though. With the festivities over, work once again began, with us shifting endless boxes from our current house to the new one. We don’t exchange until this coming Friday, but as I’ve mentioned, we’re buying from family so this means we’ve been allowed access early to dump all the crap from the shed into our new cellar. If this deal falls through now, I’m afraid it is staying right there and can be sold to the next buyer as a feature!
Not actually me.
Louise isn’t able to get out of Uni on Friday on our moving day, so she will not be around for most of the day. I wasn’t quick enough to think of a similar excuse so it looks like I’ll be in charge. Anything could happen.
So ten years, almost to the day, are drawing to an end at our current address. With the way this whole move has gone, should Louise suggest moving again anytime this millenia, she will encounter the full extent of my wrath. Then we’ll more than likely just move again!
In other news earlier in the week, I have been out and about a bit visiting all four corners of the British Isles…well Nottingham, Knutsford and Liverpool…geography wasn’t my strongest subject. These work related travels are showing signs of bearing some worthwhile fruits, and I hope to be in a much better place in that regard pretty soon. I do not wish to jinx this as I said last week, so until you hear some fat woman singing, I shall remain the elusive, charismatic, handsome enigma that I am.
Oh yes, I have also had a cold!! I suspect my body has been fooled into thinking this is November by the lovely weather we’ve been enduring. There is less moistness on the front row of a One Direction concert.
Programme not program!
This week has also brought some discussion with Emily on her plans after college. She isn’t too interested in University, despite her predicted grades being pretty pleasing, and so she has it seems been researching and plotting her course. She is going to apply for Disney’s Cultural Representative Programme, which is a 12 month placement working in WDW. This sounds great, and so we’ll be working on that with her until November when the application process opens. If anyone has done it, or know someone who has, Emily would love any advice or insight you might have on the application and interview process.
So, progress on a few fronts. I have an empty shed, some boxes already in the new house, a sniff of something like good news with my “issues” at work, and an ache in every muscle in my work addled body.
Now, I must return to the calorie consumption before I wither away into nothingness. If things pan out as I hope in the coming days, next week shall be a return to full blown WDW planning. You have been warned.
We’re packing. Alas not for a holiday, but for the move.
With ten years having elapsed the amount of absolute junk we have accumulated is staggering. This is despite having to jettison a load when we did the garage conversion last year. Bubble wrap has been acquired, boxes purloined, and every room bears the scars of the battleground that is Williams v Junk.
Pop it!
It is amazing what you find in these circumstances though. The girls have today remembered that they own (amongst a million other long forgotten objects retrieved from under a bed or drawer) a Gameboy and a Nintendo DS, with a vast library of games. These now sit on eBay hoping for a bid or three.
This afternoon Louise and I ventured into the dark expanse of horror that is…..THE LOFT! It was strewed with bin bags full of summer clothes, photos (remember when you used to get them printed?), and a vast array of games consoles from across the past decade or two. Those along with two PCs, with monitors large enough to house a small family have been wrestled down from the roof space and taken along to the tip. I am such good terms with high vis vest man at the tip that I think I’m going to be best man at his wedding.
Before tipping said PCs, I gently (ahem) removed the hard drives from them just to make sure that no-one got their hands on the porn, I mean personal data held upon them. I then employed a team of six bodybuilders to help me carry each of the HUUUGGEE PC monitors bought in the 90’s, into the mondeo. The audible groan from the trusty Ford could be heard for miles.
Our spare room is now just a giant pile of bin bags and guff that we need to sort through. That is our long weekend spoken for then.
Still it could have been worse, I could have had to watch a thousand boats go down a river in the pissing rain and cold. I caught a few minutes of this debacle on the BBC today and it was, pardon my french, piss poor. The fact that five hours of telly was devoted to it is mind blowing. I salute those having to commentate on it. Next week they are to make paint drying sound exciting.
I can’t have been the only person to wish that they had employed one of the Disney guys to organise this boats floating past a queen thing. I mean, have they not seen Fantasmic? It certainly would have made the whole thing more bearable for her Maj and those unfortunate enough to have made the journey to witness it to. Imagine the profit from the sale of ponchos too!
Exciting much?That’s more like it
I hope you all enjoy your extra two days off. Personally, I could do without them. I know that sounds silly, but at some point in the near future I’ll tell you why. I am still working through “work issues”, and if you aren’t bored of them yet, I sure am. Hopefully, very soon I shall emerge from the darkness and into the proverbial light, and get back to blog’s full of Disney planning and ludicrous innuendo.
There are times when writing down what is going on in the real world is simply not an option. Having to live through it day to day, and then write it down of a weekend is just adding insult to considerable injury, so this week I am going to block out the real world from these ramblings and instead, do a random blog about something I do want to write about.
The premise upon which many of you come here each week is the ever loosening connection between this blog and Florida. For most weeks of the year, it is hardly mentioned, and then most years, around springtime, we raid a symbolic piggy bank and book another trip, and for those few months, these pages are crammed to the rafters with my self satisfied smugness as I trot out all the things that we are planning to do.
I doff my blogging cap to those proper Disney/Florida bloggers who stay true to their original theme, at all times, and can write article after article that actually helps people plan a trip or at worst enjoy one vicariously. So as I need to not write about last week, this blog will attempt to be a “proper Florida blog”.
Now, there are millions of Disney blogs, and with a casual glance at google I suspect there is not a piece of Disney property that has not been blogged to death. With this in mind I have chosen my subject carefully, and I hope that it can therefore actually be useful to some readers, as it may be something they have never thought of doing, or didn’t know where to start.
When you’ve been a few times, you start to look outside the gates of Disney for other attractions and activities, especially if your partner threatens to confiscate your crown jewels if she has to watch Spectromagic again on the next trip.
With this as motivation, I can get quite creative. Many folks who are multiple Florida visitors, first of all fall in love with the razzmatazz of Disney, but over time there comes a realisation that it isn’t only those forty odd square miles that hold you in their spell. The magic extends, first to off property eateries, and other theme parks, and eventually to an admission that your love affair is with the atmosphere and excitement of the US itself. Now I know that us visitors to Florida are not seeing the real America. Still, my generation were raised on a staple diet of US TV shows that have engrained comforting stereotypes into our minds, so that when we encounter them for real, we are once again that eight year old boy sat in front of The Streets of San Francisco in his pyjamas, marvelling at the sheer scale of the country and Karl Malden’s nose.
One way we have discovered to unearth a little of the real America, is to attend a baseball game. We have not yet attended a major league affair, preferring instead to get closer to the action with a minor league game.
With a non sport friendly wife, and two teenage girls who would rather eat their own earwax than watch sport on TV, I must admit, my main driver for selecting a minor league game over major was that the cost per ticket was $7 each rather than something like $50. Should they get bored after the first innings then I would have no issue in abandoning the event without having to sulk for the rest of the holiday.
However, I am very happy with that choice as the atmosphere, and family involvement is excellent, and we have had an absolute ball (pardon that pun) on every occasion.
On our first visit we chose the Daytona Cubs as our team. Admittedly this was driven by our location, as we were spending a couple of days by pool and sea at Daytona, but the choice was a good one.
If you want to see which team suits your location, then The Official Site of Minor League Baseball is the place to go. Here you can see all the teams, their schedules and book tickets.
We arrived early on game night, and were welcomed despite our accents and lack of baseball knowledge like one of the locals. We noticed right away that these games were a big community event. Everyone seemed to know each other, and we soaked up the pre-game build up eagerly, looking out onto the empty diamond.
The players began to warm up, the girls picked out which ones were “fit”, and I suddenly realised how ridiculously fast they threw that ball!
What became apparent very quickly was that the ball game itself was almost a side-show to the endless flow of entertainment and games laid on to keep everyone happy. You will know that US sports all take at least seventeen hours to complete, and all the breaks in play were used expertly with games of all sorts.
There was a burrito eating competition. If only I had known beforehand, I could have claimed glory for the UK!
At times the game itself broke out, and we all enjoyed that too, with my rudimentary run down of the rules being enough for the women folk to take an interest.
Every end of innings brought ever more creative games onto the field, with the most surreal being three Dads having to catapult sponges at the floodlights whilst watched by two girls from Hooters. The Premier League have much to learn.
With a couple of beers from a passing vendor, and every food stuff you can shake a stick at on sale, you want for nothing. The atmosphere is friendly and fun, and the result of the game pretty irrelevant from what we could see.
Towards the end of the evening, all the kids gather at one end of the field, and then when given the signal they “run the bases”. This looked like great fun but I fear I just missed the age cut off.
The evening went on for hours, with more and more fun as it went. With us needing to drive back to Orlando, and a touch of raining coming in we decided to leave as the game went into extra time tied at…well, I have no idea what the score was, but we were all smiling as we left.
I remember that drive home being one of the worst experience of my life, as torrential rain and pitch black roads made for a tense hour and a bit. I think I went the whole journey without blinking or talking.
So if you have a spare evening in your plans and want to sample just a little of the life outside of the sterilised walls of the theme parks then I would heartily endorse a night at the ball game. However, one word of warning. On our second visit, to a different team, the following year I bought myself a pretzel. If they ask if you want it with salt say no. There was an inch think layer of the stuff all over it, and I was thirsty for about three weeks afterwards.
This week has been full of shit. Pardon my French, but this statement is true in more than one way.
There comes a time when you get past annoyance, self-pity and a persecution complex and just resign yourself to being on the wrong end of life’s stick with brown stuff on it. Of course, my trials and tribulations are just normal day-to-day ones, and as ever I doff my virtual cap to those folk facing real problems in life.
So the week started with bad news on the house move front, which to cut a long story short simply cost us a load of money we were not expecting. Whilst a body blow, I suppose you always have to expect these things, and it will make life tougher for a while. I entered into an enormous sulk at this point as this is clearly what sensible mature chaps of my age should do in these circumstances.
As punishment that very evening I was stricken with an illness of a magnitude to match my immaturity. At around 4am on Wednesday morning I was awoken by a rebellion in my body. I then spent the next several hours doing my best to evacuate said rebellion from all and any orifice through which liquids could pass.
My body’s ability to surprise me in this regard is endless. Even in the strongest of wretches or strains at some level I was impressed with my body’s ability to expel something that it didn’t want in it.
Wednesday was therefore a complete write off. I should have been in Newcastle that day and the next, but I was just as likely to make it to the moon in the state I was in. Louise was concerned enough to phone the doctor, and I was even more concerned to hear that he would be coming out to see me, which immediately made me think my condition was a lot worse than even I thought!
He prodded a bit, from a distance, whilst telling me he’d seen an outbreak of these cases recently, and that I should live through it. With a couple of prescriptions left behind he made his exit and I continued to be a passenger to my body’s own exit strategy.
I spent Thursday at home too, having stopped ejecting stuff, but still unable to take anything more than water in either.
The days following have been interesting. I have mainly eaten toast, fearful of incurring the wrath of my innards again, and maybe this has led to a complete reversal of fortune in the bodily functions department. That issue persists, and although I have lost a pound or two, I suspect when that event comes to pass I may set a new Weightwatchers record for weight loss in one week. The need to “evacuate” is getting to a worrying point, and I am in desperate need of a Westlife, maybe even a Westlife and a half. If you don’t know what a Westlife is, well, all I will say is “four stools”.
I need a Westlife like you wouldn’t believe
Hmm, that was a much more detailed a description of this week than I had anticipated.
So back at work on Friday still not feeling terrific, Louise called me with the great news that I had a speeding ticket, from my last visit to Newcastle. Great, another £60 down the swanny. However, the Gods diddled on my chips a little more when I got home to read that in fact I had two fines…four minutes apart. Having taken a wrong turn, I had obviously been zapped going the wrong way, and then again four minutes later going back the right way! Both times I was eight miles an hour over the limit. How the plods must have chuckled.
At this point the only choice was to accept my fate, and resign myself to a spiritual shafting. This isn’t like me at all. I have a highly polished persecution complex, but I think it was just the fact that I could not comprehend all this crap at once, and have this weekend, been relatively sanguine about things. The alternative was that at some point over the weekend I’d be stepping over dead bodies loading a fresh clip. The fact that I have no idea how to load a clip was probably instrumental then!
Louise may tell you that I have had my moments though. Since selling the house, we have all been holding our collective breath that the house would stop breaking, and that it would remain standing until we complete. Don’t get me wrong, it is structurally fine, but the little things inside it seem to be on a mission to self destruct. We have had wooden trim come loose in the hall, and the upstairs shower came close to blowing up earlier today. Just a few more weeks house, that’s all I ask!
I do claim a small victory in one event this weekend. Randomly my key fob for the car stopped working for no reason this week. To get a dealer to fix that, and empty my empty ashtrays was looking like the wrong side of £100. However, armed with a new £1 battery, and google, I have successfully reprogrammed the bugger, and my jump in the air with full fist punch on the drive may have raised an eyebrow or two in the neighbourhood. I take my wins where I can.
To redress that balance, Emily is trying to print off her Photography coursework at the moment, and the printer and computer, who are obviously friends with the upstairs shower are playing up like you wouldn’t believe. I dislike computers a lot.
To distract myself from these horrors, I spent a little bit of Friday evening on some holiday planning. It may not surprise you to know that the focus was on eating. It dawned on me that we always eat at the same places, and whilst we still will do our favourites, I felt it was time to look for fresh fields. A bit of Dibbage with a sprinkle of Google led me to a couple of places that we will try.
You’d better stock up!
Mannys seems to be a popular choice of lots of folk, so that is on “the planner” and having salivated all over my laptop at their menu, the Orlando Ale House is another that I have decreed that we shall try. The amount of pleasure taken from this planning activity is abnormally high, but there you go.
As Louise often tells me, I just need to “deal with stuff” so that is what I am doing. Hopefully, if there are swings and roundabouts the coming weeks will bring a few ups, and I don’t mean the contents of my stomach. Until then I am googling how to load that fresh clip.
I think both Louise and I feel pretty battered and bruised by the last seven days for different reasons. I have done a mini UK tour, taking in London on Tuesday, which is always a chore and never a pleasure, and then Newcastle over Wednesday and Thursday.
I always find traveling for work, especially when mixed with overnight stays tiring and laborious, especially when the venue for said overnight stay is the very glamorous Premier (you must pronounce it Pree-Meer) Inn.
After a one meeting jaunt to London on Tuesday I drove up to Newcastle on Wednesday morning to open our new office there. There was no gathering of local dignitaries unfortunately. The grand opening was pretty much just me, carrying a new PC, and our new starter. To his credit he settled in very quickly, and the two days passed without much incident.
One highlight of the stay was dinner with Steve, my ex-colleague, but thankfully not ex-friend. He was in Sunderland on that day so we had arranged to meet up. Every day is indeed a school day as when we came to order our pre-dinner drinks in the exclusive Pree-Meer Inn bar, the two Guinnesseseseses we ordered were served up from a tin, looking all flat and uninviting, but then they were placed on some contraption, in a little pool of water, and as if by magic, agitated into a fully fledged perfectly acceptable pint. It was as if I had just witnessed the invention of fire!
Food wise dinner was OK, but it was great to catch up with Steve, and I only rubbed it in a little bit about our recently booked trip. I have to be gentle with Steve as I never know when we will next need loan of some DVC points or a dog sitter!
Towards the end of dinner, we were delighted to hear the dulcet tones of the fire alarm. Of course everyone sat looking at each other for a good few minutes hoping to not have to move, but alas the staff ushered us outside. Now, up in Newcastle I am classed as a southern jessy, and I confirmed that status by coming close to death whilst stood outside in the sub-zero temperatures of an early May evening. It was bloody freezing, and of course being a resident of the hotel my nice warm coat was enjoying itself up in my room watching some channels it shouldn’t have been. Well, that’s my excuse for them appearing on the bill!
It was too cold for snow!
Eventually, the fire engines came and went, and we were allowed back in to thaw out. Steve set off for home and I watched crap telly in my underpants. Don’t worry I did go to my own room first! It truly is a showbiz lifestyle I lead.
Homeward bound…..
So there you have my bruising week. Whilst I was living the Vida Loca by the Tyne Louise was having all sorts of fun and games with the vendor of the house we are buying. This fun and games was made all the more interesting as she is “family”. I won’t go into details here, frankly as we are all now absolutely sick of talking and hearing about it. In summary the survey on our new house flagged some issues, and these had a material impact on the valuation the bank gave to the house, and in turn to the amount they would lend on it, and so began two days of heated debate about us trying to “rip her off” etc etc, when it was absolutely nothing to do with us.
That is the tip of that iceberg but it shall remained submerged here. All I will say is that you would not believe some of the goings on if I wrote them here anyway! Suffice to say, we ended the week in a position where we can progress, and the move is still on. This was not the case for some of the week, so it has been a bit of a roller coaster.
So we arrived at the weekend, thankful to hear the bell for the end of the fight, and for the extra day off, and needing a good sponge down, running repairs to a couple of cuts, and some words of wisdom from Buster Meredith. (He was in Rocky(s)) Excellent use of brackets there!
Holiday wise, there hasn’t been much time to drool over Disney websites or plan too much, but I did manage to book the minivan, and start to put a plan together. The plans so far involve a meet up with Jakki, Steve and the kids whose names I dare not try to spell. We have arranged a golf day for the men folk where Steve and I will be easily beaten by a man in his mid seventies. I love golfing in Florida! Then that same evening, the Cooper and Williams clans will convene at a suitable Applebees for feasting before invading Epcot for fireworks and frivolity.
The only other thing we’ve committed to do is return to Daytona to watch the Cubs play baseball whilst we eat!
The weekend so far still has not yielded too much time for Disney planning as we’ve been busy with other things. There is still tomorrow of course but that is Rebecca’s birthday, so much, no, all of her day will be spent readying herself for her birthday meal tomorrow evening with five friends, and Louise and I will be on taxi duty. I hope they eat well before they come!! Rebecca has a new outfit, shoes, jewellery and enough make up to keep the cast of Chicago going for months.
After spending this afternoon at a steam fair I shall be doing similarly exciting and sexy things tomorrow no doubt. Garden Centres, Stannah stairlift demonstrations and walk in bath showrooms will not be safe from me.
To be fair we had a nice afternoon at the Last Drop Village. We met up with Mum and Dad, and my brother and his wife, who took their dog Baxter. Much hilarity ensued as he and Oli spent about an hour chasing each other and playing like things possessed. I think they tired each other out so it has been a peaceful evening.
He’s eaten a whole wheel of cheese.
We entertained Louise’s Mum for tea, and then spent our evenings watching films we’d seen before or browsing the internet. Louise was looking at stuff we can’t afford for our new house, whereas Emily was watching YouTube videos of the Fantasyland expansion to see if anything new would be open when we go. Not much will be it seems, but my obsessive planning ways seem to have made it down the family tree well enough! My work here is done.
In the blue corner, all the way from Pragmatic Town, in the county of Prudent is the challenger, “stay at home this summer”. In the red corner, from Rash Decision USA, is the reigning champion, with over ten years of victories under his belt, you all know him, it’s “sod it, we’re going no matter what the consequences!!”
In the battle outlined above, we have seen some very one-sided contests over the past eleven years, with the challenger, never really troubling the scorers. This year as you are all painfully aware has been a much closer fight. With a house move, to a house that needs work doing, me just two months into a new job, and Louise giving up work to take the easy option of becoming a nurse (I mean really get a proper job!), you can see how the odds were heavily stacked against the reigning champion.
The fight has been bloody and painful, with all of the family taking some real body blows from the realisation that defeat looked very much on the cards, and our summer would be more tent in the back garden than the Garden Grill. With Emily’s constant playing of Disney music at high volume, and Louise posting angst on Facebook most days, it has only been Rebecca and I that have managed to keep a lid on our feelings!
Out of the four of us I think I was bearing up the best, if you can imagine that, and I was hunkered down for a summer of work, crap weather, and not having to bother to lose weight! We have a house move to organise, and it was during some activity related to this that this week’s major news unfolded. Louise was clearing out the Narnia style wilderness that is our “under the stairs” ready for the move.
I was at work, working. I say that as in the past at this time of year, I would pretty much either be spending eight hours a day on flight websites, or if already booked, indulging in some other crucial planning activity. With no such pleasures to distract me, it was left to a text from Louise to do that.
Here is how the conversation went….
Louise Williams 19th April – 10:21am.
I want to go to Florida
Craig Williams 19th April – 10:21am
Me too!
Louise Williams 19th April – 10:22am
Well pull your finger out and make it happen
Craig Williams 19th April 10:30am
Oh I can make it happen no problem. Are you OK living in a tent?
Louise Williams 19th April 10:30am
Blah
Louise Williams 19th April 10:33am
Still tempted though! How can we make it happen then?
Craig Williams 19th April 10:40am
OK, it’s booked!
Louise Williams 19th April 10:41am
Don’t joke. I’m not joking, all I need you to say is sod it, let’s go in August.
Louise Williams 19th April 10:45am
Stop working and pay attention to me!!
Louise Williams 19th April 10:59am
DON’T IGNORE ME!
Craig Williams 19th April 11:07am
I was having a (word removed for decency purposes)
Louise Williams 19th April 11:10am
So?
Craig Williams 19th April 11:11am
I’m looking at flights!
So you can see the terrific fight I put up there. From there, began several days of deeper, more intelligent conversations about how we could manage to go, once I’d discovered that flights were indeed bloody expensive, and some of those conversations were even done face to face rather than text!
I can confirm that I did use up all of the internet for those few days, and if a website was capable of spitting out a flight price to Florida, I was on it, completing a spreadsheet with every conceivable permutation of dates. This in itself was complicated enough. With Louise starting Uni, but having not yet started (at the time) we were not sure of what her holiday dates would be. We had to wait several days to get absolute clarity on that.
Then the logistics of going away on holiday when you are stupid enough to have three cats and a dog is something similar to organising the D-Day landings, especially when all the family members likely to do pet sitting duties had the nerve to have booked a trip to France right in the middle of the dates we had in mind. This thought process and the asking, leading to begging took a few further days too.
It's a good job he's cute
Once Louise had her dates confirmed, and we knew the extent of the costs, we were down to the nitty-gritty of actually doing something about it. Louise’s confirmed holiday dates did at least help us slightly with animal fostering as they were after the return of my Mum & Dad, and Emily’s friends return from her holiday who we had volunteered to feed our cats. I told you this was complex.
At this point I called my Dad to ask him if he’d like to adopt some form of pet for a while this summer, as now we were looking to leave the day after he got back from France…unless, I said, you want to turn right around and come with us? Never for a second thinking that they would consider or afford that. To cut that part of the story shorter, that evening my Mum & Dad came to our house to have a chat about it, and within around seven minutes of them arriving, we had booked the flights. Honestly, my Dad has less will power than I do in these matters!
So there you have a brief summary of what has been around a week of stressful searching, organising and strategising.
Now I am sure many of you are wondering if we have sacks of money lay under the bed. If you had seen our bed and the age of it, you would know that is not the case. What I have outlined above is purely the undeniable tractor beam that is WDW and Florida working its magic once again. Over the years we have sacrificed many things to get there, and this time our sacrifice is that the work that needs doing on our new house will be undertaken, in the main, by us, (and my brother and my Dad, but they don’t know that yet) rather than taking the easy option and throwing lots of money at someone to take the pain away!
Anyone that knows my views on DIY will know the level of sacrifice this represents for me. It is one step down from losing one of the twins! Speaking of which, Oli lost both this week, and has hardly blinked or even noticed. But I digress. This is a WDW only zone this week.
So finally we get to the details of this upcoming trip. With Louise fairly and squarely now to blame for two things –
Booking this holiday
Not doing Disney at all last year, and then halfway into the holiday announcing that she missed it. How we laughed!
I can assure you all that the ONLY thing we will be doing this year is Disney, in terms of theme parks anyway. It also helps keep the costs down.
Our flights were OK, price wise, when compared to the majority of flights I had seen in horror, for most of my searching. We ended up paying £598 each for indirect flights on the 19th of August. I had spent far longer than was healthy on the internet looking for flights, but ironically, we booked off-line through a company my Mum found with one Google search, Fly and Save. Other than them having the right badges on their website, I suspect they operate out of a shed somewhere on the outskirts of Walthamstow. Until I had the confirmation number and was able to select our seats on the Delta site I was mildly concerned that our cash was being laundered through the Eastern Bloc, but it seems all is in order after all.
Accommodation wise, simplicity is the key this year. In past years we have done all sorts of multiple moves, and enjoyed them, but this year it is one villa, for the two weeks, no messing about. Again, costs being a factor too. We have chosen a lovely looking four bedroom villa on Silver Creek, off of the Dibb of course.
Our house, in the middle of our street...for 2 weeks...
The minivan is booked, and we’ll sort out park tickets much nearer the time. We’re also going to go back to Daytona, to watch the Daytona Cubs baseball team. We might tie that in with a drive up to St Augustine, I’m not sure yet.
No matter, the facts are that we’re booked, we have some vague plan for paying for stuff, and all the animals are housed for the duration! Hurrah!
Phew, it has been a right old-time. Add to that, a house move, a new job, two teenage daughters, too many animals, and if I don’t have a heart attack before I’m 50, I deserve a medal.
So I can now settle into a few months of planning, spreadsheet writing and most importantly some Disney food porn. It is half the fun of these things, but hey, if you’re reading this you probably know that anyway.
So if you are still with me after what has turned into a long, long blogathon, well done. You have witnessed first hand the absolute power of Florida and more specifically WDW. It is so powerful that it has now infected Louise, who just a few short years ago would want to do silly things like decorate the house or re-do the kitchen before booking such a holiday. Now, we just have to do both!! Fair enough.
Let the countdown, and the diet begin. Since booking I keep getting little jolts of excitement as I remember something we can do, now that we’re going, that I had safely locked away in the “don’t remember that, it’s too painful” part of my brain. In that list so far…..
A kitchen sink
Jellyrolls
A long list of restaurants
Baseball
and the rest are pretty much food related.
The adventure begins, and this time, we’re taking the parents!!!
Mkingdon's Blog 