Month: June 2021

600 Not Out.

by mkingdon, posted in Walt Disney World

The life of a WDW obsessed freak is seldom a boring one. There is always some new thing, rumour or experience to obsess over. This past week has been a glorious extravaganza of news and new stuff, all related to the 50th celebrations of Magic Kingdom from October 1st.

Our move to the 3rd of October now seems like strategic genius until of course we are still not allowed to travel to the US until 2025 and we all have a collective nervous breakdown and sit sobbing in a corner remembering the old days when we could go on holiday.

So you will have all heard the news I’m sure. My weekly slot will never give you new information but here we go with the main headlines.

A new fireworks show at MK

A new fireworks show at Epcot

A new day time show at DAK

(By the way, Fantasmic…it’s fine to join in!)

Ratatouille ride at Epcot opens October 1st

Add to that the stream of daily news about restaurants and shows reopening and basically WDW is seemingly determined to show that the pandemic was a figment of someone’s imagination and normality has always been the norm. I’m all for it. If you’ve done your bit and had the jab (if you can) then we should be heading back to normal (whilst being sensible).

By the time we go (if we go), all of our party (Freddie aside of course) will be double pricked and ready to party.

It is ironic and painful to see this dash to normality in and around WDW when we are sitting here watching our case numbers sky rocket and our ability to travel is restricted to the UK and holiday hot spots such as the Falkland Islands.

It’s almost as if folks who should be concentrating on pandemic related stuff had other things on their minds recently and forgot to lock the door to a more contagious variant.

I’ve been mildly enraged by the incompetent and fraudulent handling of the pandemic for some time now, but luckily for you, I hide it well. With Hancock’s disgraced exit over the weekend I am noticing a good number of folks join me on that particular journey.

Let The Hate Flow Through You | Know Your Meme

The weapons grade hypocrisy layered on top of the fraudulent lining of their mates’ pockets and spectacular incompetence is too enraging for words.

If there had been any suggestion just a couple of months ago that we would be staring down the barrel of another wave, prolonged restrictions and still no holidays by the end of summer, even I may have believed that to be beyond the ability of government to achieve and yet here we are, with even our October dates still looking unknown and uncertain. Maybe we will just roll seamlessly into the inevitable winter lockdowns and really make sure the airlines die a slow horrible death.

You see, it is positive and cheery messages like this that has seen you enjoy endure 600 of these posts now. That’s right, I noticed as I started this one that I have to date posted 599 of these things and today will make it 600. Some may argue, and be absolutely correct, that this is about 599 too many, but on the odd occasion I don’t post, my inbox is full of a message asking where it is. I have to listen to the will of the people.

I suppose my growing anger is fuelled by seeing WDW racing back to normality and really, really missing being there and having any chance of rectifying that being pissed away by chancers with no concern other than their own personal gain and gratification. Let’s keep it about trivialities like holidays and not get started on what the NHS has been through or folks who have lost close ones and had to say goodbye on an iPad and not have a proper funeral.

And breathe.

So, by October, it’ll all be fine right? This is the equivalent of those unending posts on the various Disney Facebook groups where (daily it seems) some poor soul posts a

“We’re booked for (insert date a few weeks away). Anyone else still hopeful?”

This is followed by a mixture of views ranging from absolute certainty that by “then” it will all be OK and doom mongers who predict that anyone travelling outside of your own post code will be shot on sight. It’s just all so bloody draining isn’t it?

Yep, I’m tired and emotional. I have next week off work though so that’ll fix that. Next week’s 601st post will be a deluge of positivity and delight. Indeed, last week Johnson “hinted” that double jabbed folks may be able to travel “somewhat freely” at some unspecified point in the future to destinations not yet made clear. It is this clear and precise messaging that is the reason he is in charge.

Somebody take this keyboard away from me….

Till the next time……

One Date More…

by mkingdon, posted in Walt Disney World

Another day, another destiny, this never ending road to Kissimmee…

We move our trip another time, if we can’t go I’ll lose my mind,

One date more….

The time is early afternoon, the day last Wednesday. I’m at work, attending to things that don’t really matter, but somehow demand all my attention and time when somewhere in my “socials” I see the news.

Aer Lingus had cancelled all their Manchester flights up to the 30th of September. Well, that was just rude.

I’ll be honest. There was a period of around half an hour where I just sat and stared at my keyboard genuinely not knowing what to do. I mean, that is often the case with work related matters but seldom with holiday stuff.

Staring down the barrel of a fifth set of dates, the wind was well and truly out of my sails. I pissed about on the Virgin Atlantic website laughing out loud at their prices for our dates. I really, really did not want to have to pick up and move everything again, but switching airlines was clearly not an option.

We were moving. Again.

I think coming to that conclusion was the catalyst and kick up the arse I needed to spring into action. As much as I had cursed Aer Lingus for their out of the blue decision, when I phoned them, settling in for a few hours on hold, their automated message told me I could change my flights on their website. Virgin, take note. Also, Virgin, any time you want to give me my refund for the flights you cancelled over two months ago, that would be lovely. We are at the “our dog ate your refund” stage of excuses now. It’s bordering on fraud at this point.

The ability to move my own flights was excellent and allowed me to manipulate a series of dates to find the set that suited us best. I was resolute in my desire not to spend another bloody penny on this trip that never is, so my main criteria was getting flights for the same money.

It took some fiddling but I managed it. We had to sacrifice a day off the trip so it’s 16 days now, not 17, but to be honest the extra length of the trip was in honour of my 50th celebrations which seem so long ago now that it kinda feels right to sacrifice that specialness.

So with the flights moved, it was onto everything else. Our new dates are the 3rd of October to the 18th of October. We’ve been in October once before back in 1999, so we know it well.

A Collection of House of Cards' Best Frank Underwood Side-Eye GIFs | Frank underwood, Kevin spacey, House of cards

I once again saluted the flexible nature of Travel Republic and Discount Florida Car Hire, who have made all this pissing about a lot easier. Alas, Hard Rock is not available for our new dates so we have defaulted to the Royal Pacific, as we have in the past, so no great hardship there.

I am getting incredibly efficient and effective at this now. Within about an hour I had cancelled/rebooked/moved almost everything I could. Two elements remained outstanding.

  1. Vero. Borrowing DVC points via a broker is probably not the wisest move in a pandemic as it seems we are likely to lose that cash now. Unless borders are still closed on August 20th, we won’t be able to get a credit note for our bookings. It stinks and I probably won’t use this company again, but it is what it is.
  2. Park tickets. The ones we bought, sometime in the late 90’s it now feels like, were set to expire at the end of September. My Dad’s tickets which at this point were somewhere in the postal system having only ordered them a few days ago may also have had a similar end date. An email to Floridatix was replied to a few hours later and it seems our dates had been extended and certainly for the ones I had in my grubby mits, I was able to book new park reservations for our new dates. Yesterday, my Dad’s tickets turned up and they are all park reservationed up now too.

I am very much over all this now. We just need to go on holiday.

I am refusing to let myself believe these dates will happen. I daren’t. Florida it seems is charging back to normality at lightning pace as we lurch back into more lockdown having pissed away all the benefits of the vaccine programme. These are just the latest set of dates in the diary. When we are sat on the plane, wheels up, I may let myself think we’re going.

Trying to fill my glass at least half way, if we go on these dates the 50th celebrations for Magic Kingdom will have started. I am telling myself that WDW will for all intents and purposes be back to normal by then and there will be lots of new things specifically for that anniversary that we may not have seen otherwise.

It will be Halloween. I mean, it’s Halloween in WDW from August, but you know what I mean. I don’t think we’ll do the Boo Bash thing as it seems pricey for what you get and I suppose we could try and do Halloween Horror Nights at Universal but it isn’t suitable for Freddie and Emily may well pass out with fear if we subject her to that. The weather will be slightly less hurricaney and we’ll be safely back in the UK before the half term crowds are unleashed on the US from the UK.

Last week brought all the usual speculation and reading between the lines on when travel may be allowed. Fauci was interviewed and seemed to suggest September and it makes you wonder if the airlines have been given some form of heads up to that effect that may have informed Aer Lingus’ decision?

Other rumours are that it will be late July/early August. From a UK perspective Johnson has seemingly painted himself into a corner, saying that July 19th is a “terminus” day and if that is the case there can be little wiggle room not to allow leisure travel at that point. The balance to that logic is that he also said we’d break the back of it in 12 weeks in late Spring 2020 so there is that plus an entire back catalogue of lies, incompetence and failure.

There are even leaks and rumours that double jabbed folks will be relatively unrestricted in terms of the faff required to fly etc. Nobody knows and if anyone thinks the clowns we have running the show have any sort of masterplan then I can’t help you. Literally every case of Covid we have in this country is the one that was allowed in from India by not adding them to the red list at the same time as Bangladesh and Pakistan. I know I piss and moan about governmental incompetence a lot but it makes me angry. Of course they are screwing our holidays up but think of all the businesses that had recruited and planned to open on June 21st. It’s gross negligence.

So as much I enjoy planning these trips, the ratio of five lots of planning to zero actual trips is not one I can get on board with. I am weary of it all and just want any form of certainty at this point.

Away from moaning about governmental incompetence and travel uncertainty, I will end today’s post with a Happy Father’s Day to my Dad and all those who assume that role in any form.

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From my perspective it is the best job in the world interspersed with occasional horror but it’s the only job I’ve ever had that I never wanted to change.

Join me here next week for more head in hands incredulity linked to the simple act of booking a holiday and going on it.

Till the next time………

White Van Man

by mkingdon, posted in Walt Disney World

Before we get started, for all of you that enquired about the hot tub, it’s sold. Sorry, I know that will be disappointing but I had to go with the highest offer out of the one I received on eBay, so to the none of you who expressed an interest, I am sorry you missed out.

So that was pleasing news this week. Cash in my sky rocket and the neighbours won’t need to bleach their eyes after seeing me sit in a blow up bath on the back lawn.

It’s been another rage inducing week of things getting worse Covid wise, with all the talk now of things not opening up. Biden met with Johnson this week of course and there is every possibility that having done so he launches the nukes rather than open his borders.

Despite all the evidence to the contrary, mainly due to Aer Lingus telling me, honest Injun, that there were only four seats left at that price on our flight, we have had to take the plunge and get seats booked for my Mum & Dad. We’d hoped to leave things loose until later in the summer when things may be clearer about travel to the US, but their marketing technique worked and now my Mum & Dad have joined me in the speculation market surrounding holidays.

The “only four seats left” trick seemed a little fibby when I was able to request seats next to our existing booking with ease, but I am sure they were being totally honest. This triggered a series of other planning requirements that I executed yesterday. The complexity of the adding ons, rearranging and planning is high, but I am, I think, up to that challenge. My life to date has brought me to this point and I have developed a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career, skills that make me a nightmare for people like you.

Having done some research on vehicles that would accommodate our engorged numbers and all their equipment it seemed I had three choices. A 12 seater transit van type thing (with windows), a 15 seat monster or start taking lessons for my HGV licence. I opted for the first of those and we now have a “Transit van equivalent” reserved with Discount Florida Car Hire. Their flexible approach has been invaluable in all this mess. Way, way back when I was much more naïve, I had booked our (much cheaper) car hire with my usual US Rent A Car. I’m afraid their policies were still the rigid and expensive model if you wanted to make any changes so I cancelled them some time ago sacrificing my £50 deposit and haven’t looked back.

So, according to their web site this is the beast I shall be aiming down the I4 after a nine hour flight and little sleep.

So that we can secure theme park reservations for Mum & Dad an order has been placed with Floridatix for 14 day Disney tickets. They should come next week. They have heeded my advice to give Universal a miss on our first two days. It will give them time to recover from the flight, receive and get used to their scooters and not waste a chunk of change on theme parks that don’t offer that much they would wish or are allowed to do.

Two days by the Hard Rock pool should be a nice way to begin their holiday.

So it’s been a busy couple of days in the planning of the trip that never happens.

Outside of that I have fixed our boiler. I say fixed, it wasn’t really broken, and shouldn’t be, as it is pretty much brand new and state of the art, but that, like many things in this house was the problem. The previous guy liked a gadget and therefore everything is “smart” or has a remote control or both. All that had happened was a drop in pressure on the boiler. Now, I may not be the handiest of men but I have always known or been able to figure out how to do that. Not with this boiler. There was no tap or lever to do this anywhere. I watched endless You Tube videos in which plumbers skirted around the issue and when I did find a video about our specific boiler it seemed my guy had a non-standard option installed with regard to refilling pressure. Of course he did.

I even sent photos to a plumber (he asked I don’t send any more of “those” photos and keep it to ones of the boiler) and even he was stumped. After many hours, I took the front of the thing off again, pulled some bits down that were pull downable and there hiding behind a black pipe was a small brass thing. I tentatively stuck a screwdriver into it and turned and the sweet sound of rushing water and a rising pressure gauge told me I had cracked the Da Vinci Code. Why so hard?

Then, yesterday I moved onto the grass. Yes, I know I only moaned about cutting it two weeks ago, but it seems when I cut it back then I just made it angry and it has in that time put a lot of effort into making me mow it again.

I did two hours yesterday and got about half way down the field. I did briefly consider wonder how much it might be to pave the bloody thing, but I may be out there again today trying to tackle the rest. I hear lots of advice about getting sheep or similar, but we have enough pets thank you and that restraining order from the RSPCA is still in place anyway.

So, the plan has changed, again. The number of travellers increased on the Dibb Vacation Planner (the one thing I still use The Dibb for) and it now has more moving parts than our boiler. If you plan to be in Florida in September, firstly, let’s hope we get to be there, but secondly if you see a white van hurtling around WDW with two scooters strapped to the roof that’ll probably be us. Give us a wave.

Till the next time…..

Do You Wanna Buy A Hot Tub…?

by mkingdon, posted in Walt Disney World

I’m sure there is some legend or custom somewhere that says something like everyone endures their own personal purgatory or hell. For me, someone who has been known to enjoy a trip to WDW, this never ending waiting and re-booking of such a trip seems to be mine.

Like some memory deficient goldfish, each time I move the dates I am, in that moment, absolutely convinced it will go ahead. Then, sometimes, moments or days afterwards, I am kicking myself for my fanciful naivety as I stare down the barrel of another postponement and more admin and expense. How I yearn for the heady days of booking a holiday and then going on it.

To quote the leather clad love God David Coverdale, here I go again.

Classic rock glam metal GIF on GIFER - by Gardazuru

Another government briefing and a backward step in the hunt for a holiday. The only meaningful country on the green list is back to amber and with cases here rising by 160% recently, you can almost hear Joe Biden tutting in disappointment and disbelief that we did this to ourselves despite Matt Hancock pleasuring himself in public last week at how good a job he has personally done in delivering every single vaccine himself.

Experts have been warning (deja vu, right?) for weeks that because we didn’t do anything about incoming folks from India in early April, and removed masks in schools full of unvaccinated kids, re-opening stuff would lead to another wave but yet again, those “in charge” take action too late, driven more by their own PR and agenda than doing what is required. We didn’t need to be here.

So our nailed on September trip, unencumbered by masks (probably) now looks incredibly unlikely in my view. Why on earth would the US (or anyone) let us in when we’ve imported a more contagious and deadly variant just so we didn’t upset a country we need a totemic trade deal with to pretend that our self-inflicted collapse in trade with our neighbours is all OK?

Angry? Yep!

Sure, it’s only a holiday (and believe me, in real life, outside of writing this stuff each week, I know there are many more important issues and problems…more of which later) but let’s not forget the travel industry which if not already dead, is being stamped on repeatedly just to make sure. And if I see one more article or tweet about a staycation I will be kidnapping Judith Chalmers until this madness is ended. Not sure if she’s still with us, but either way….

I will be a long time dead before you see me holidaying in some rain soaked British “resort” spending thousands for an inferior experience I don’t want to have.

As if somehow subliminally I know we will be spending our summer in our garden we have been kitting it out with stuff. Recently I was fortunate enough to win some garden stuff via an incentive at work. So that included some of this ever so on trend rattan furniture, a voucher with which we bought a fire pit and a small hot tub.

On that note if anyone wishes to purchase a hot tub, still in box, for much cheapness compared to what John Lewis flog it for, then hit me up. It’s only a small two person inflatable thing but me in my budgie smugglers in the back garden is not something I wish to inflict on anyone so yeah, hot tub fans, get in touch and we can do a deal.

We also purchased a BBQ. So once the furniture arrives (it’s been a while already) our garden will be fully equipped. It’ll be fun sat inside seeing it all get rained on as I watch some more vlogs from a place we can’t get back to.

Yes, I am watching vlogs again. Having what I thought was a realistic chance of going soon put me back in the mood. How long that will last nobody knows.

In more upbeat news, last week both Emily and Tom had their first jabs. They aren’t officially old enough yet but they took advantage of one of the many walk in facilities currently on the go in Bolton as it is the new Wuhan at the epicentre of the global pandemic. Stu Francis will be mortified. A sore arm here and there aside they are fine and will both be double jabbed come the end of July.

I am now as of yesterday, a double prick. I have the sore arm and mild aches to prove it. To quote another musical legend, David Guetta, I am now Titanium.

In less nice news last week saw both Louise’s Mum and Rebecca enduring short hospital stays. Both are back home and hopefully on the mend, so whilst I do primarily rant about the lack of our holiday each week, do understand that I hold it in the appropriate level of importance outside of what you read here each week.

During last week’s extended weekend we hosted a BBQ. Discussions turned as you might expect to holidays in a certain place and my Mum & Dad, who probably had come to terms with the fact that they had done their last such trip began to consider another foray into the breach once we established that a scooter rental for the duration of the trip would be affordable. Slugging it out around the parks on foot is not an option for them now, but this would open the possibility of going again.

After checks with medical professionals, they were green lit and it does now look as though they will ride again, literally. We are now in the early stages of adding them to everything, in a measured and relaxed way, as we still do suspect the trip may not be allowed, so the booking of low deposit, cancellable things is being done first.

I am now looking at our car hire options and wondering what vehicle will take eight people and two scooters. Do they do double decker buses?

So our eternal flame of hope (how many pop legend references can I get into one post…..with that cap doff to Suzannah Hoff and her Bangles) still shines, if not a little dimmed from last week. Whilst I still sit cursing the incompetence that has us set fair for a fourth wave and international shunnery I still keep booking stuff and planning this trip that never happens.

Despite Roger Daltrey’s wise words, I will, it seems continue to be fooled again.

Till the next time……