Freddie’s First Florida Fiesta – Day Five 2nd September 2018

I look at my notes for today and it says we had a lazy start. It feels like there was a lot of this already this trip. I do wonder then why, looking back now, that I was definitely the most tired I have ever been on one of these things this year.

Sure, I’m the oldest I’ve ever been, but without stealing my Jerry Springer style summing up at the end thunder, I may have pushed the pace too hard.

Anyway, lazy we were and there was some TV watching, Freddie had his toast for breakfast and everyone generally did nothing until about 10.30 when readying began. We left the villa at 11.30 and headed for what turned out to be a very busy I4. I don’t tend to think about things like this when planning, but we were heading for Toothsome for lunch, and if I were back home I would seriously question driving that far to anywhere for lunch. It’s different here and on holiday of course food is very much part of the destination not the journey for us, and there is only one Toothsome, so travel we must and did.

It took us forty-five minutes to get to a Universal car parking spot and, another thing I wouldn’t do at home, I spent $22 on parking without blinking an eye or ranting for three and half hours, which I definitely would do in the UK.

We were in Spiderman 455. We unloaded everyone and Freddie’s stroller and after a battle with some escalators and some elevators that weren’t working, or at least not quickly enough for my patience, we were on the moving walkways and heading into City Walk.

By jingo it was hot.

We arrived at Toothsome, and again, it’s a bloody long walk from the car to get there, just after 12.45. There was no wait and we were taken upstairs and seated immediately.

Now, we were here for food. The chap at the front desk clarified that, as they must get a load of folks rocking up just for milkshakes. Regardless of our dining intentions, our priority of course was a milkshake so we spent many minutes looking at a menu we had read many times before the trip, even watching a vlog about them all, to help in our decision-making process.

I still rushed it a bit, and ended up blurting one out feeling pressured by the waiting server.

Me – PB&J

Mikey & Rebecca – Celebration

I can only apologise for the blatant lack of a photo. There is no excuse.

Emily – Key Lime

Tom – Brownie

Louise – No milkshake, but some wine

They are absolutely bloody lovely. I know they look impressive and that is important, but the taste does not disappoint. I loved mine as did everyone else.

We sucked on these whilst waiting for our meals to arrive.

Me – Red Reuben

Louise – Houmous & a side of Onion Rings

 

Emily, Mikey and Rebecca – Chicken Sandwich

Tom – Burger

Freddie – Pasta

Imagine the fullest thing you can, double it and add a bit more and that was me. I was absolutely stuffed, bordering on hospitalisation. So a good meal!

We walked, slowly, back to the car in incredible heat wondering if we would ever need to eat again. (We did).

The plan stated that this afternoon was a non-theme park day and instead we were to go shopping. How this would make the day any more restful, I have never known, but we have always done some shopping so off we went. The location was to be the Premium Outlet Malls at Lake Buena Vista.

The fatal flaw in this plan was defined by the very reason for its existence. Today was Labor (sic) Day weekend, and as such, my plan was to stay as far away from theme park crowds as possible. It seemed that all of those crowds had instead congregated at this mall. We toured the car park for about twenty minutes before finally admitting defeat. There was just no chance of us finding a spot and so I left that traffic nightmare and drove straight into another. The queue of cars to get back to the Crossroads area (Benny says Hi….ask your granddad) past Bahama Breeze was just bobbins. We sat and waited for about half an hour inching forward slowly. Just as we got to the front of the queue some f*ck nugget tried to just indicate and swing in right in front of us. If Freddie’s first words are unrepeatable, this moment will be why. I can assure you, I did not let him in.

Denied of retail therapy at one location we headed to Disney Springs, where these days, the one thing you can be pretty sure of is a parking spot. We pulled into Lime, found a spot easily and disembarked.

We wandered some shops, I have to say halfheartedly.  Emily got a hoodie but other than that nothing was purchased and enthusiasm for such was very low it had to be said.

Rebecca voiced those views first and said they’d rather be in a park. Faced with a fairly forceful sulk, it was agreed that we’d chance a theme park as they couldn’t be any busier than these bloody shops.

Don’t worry, the pin had been removed from the back of this badge…I mean pin…no, I mean badge. There was nothing sharp on what Freddie was holding here is what I am saying.

Once back in the car we pointed the van at Magic Kingdom. He who dares wins.

We parked in…

At this time of day there was no army of Cast Members waving you to the bottom of a row so we drifted around the car park like it was the Premium Outlet Mall again until we found a spot.

We were by now getting quite skilled at the routine from the car, onto the tram and off again. Everyone had assumed a role, and we dismantled the stroller and boarded in a few seconds like on of those F1 pit land crews. We didn’t wear helmets though.

We monorailed in

Once in the park we consulted the app to see what horrendous queues awaited us and to confirm that no FastPasses would be available for anything.

 

I have to say, I struggled with the app this year. It was constantly flakey. Certain pages never loaded. For example, whenever I viewed our plans, unless I filtered by something, no content appeared. It froze a lot and was generally about as fast as an episode of Poldark. (Sorry my hatred for all Sunday evening period dramas seeps out now and again).

With every ride rammed we resorted to meeting a character. We rarely do this these days and hadn’t done any this trip. With Freddie with us, we should and we did. We struck out up Main Street heading for Tomorrowland and Buzz who was out doing a meet.

On the way, we passed “the purple wall”. If you “do” Instagram you’ll know….

Mikey, Tom and Rebecca joined the queue for Buzz for Freddie’s first ever official character meet.

We wondered if he would be terrified of them. It may run in the family as Louise is quite scared of other large things with weird heads.

As they queued I loitered ready to take a few photos once they got to Buzz.  There was an Edna drive by…

We needn’t have worried about Freddie. Like everything else on this trip he took Buzz in his stride.

As did Mikey.

Whilst waiting I had used the app to book some FastPasses having found some actually did exist. The first of which was…

This is a ride I hadn’t been on since 2003 I think. After a pre-ride wee our FastPass time came around and we all boarded except Louise who I think thought it may be too thrilling for her.

After feeding Freddie, we now headed back to Tomorrowland (sure, I do know we just came from there…) and we did the old faithful rides when things are busy and you need something to do between FastPasses. First,

Even this had a small queue, but we were soon aboard, enjoying Magic Kingdom at dusk.

When you are “the planner” of the group there can be a certain pressure. Every time you leave a ride all eyes turn to you with a “What now?” attached. So I often find that whilst on one ride my mind is thinking of the next step or two. In this case, the answer was right in front of me and we did Carousel of Progress.

There was a holiday many years ago when Rebecca was obsessed with the song and we had it in the car for the whole fortnight. There is no greater testament of our love for her than the fact that she survived.

Our second FastPass was now due and thankfully it was for Buzz and not some ride at the other side of the park.

Again, the scores weren’t important. These competitive Dads who can’t just appreciate the joy of taking part with their family are a real source of dismay!

As we exited the ride the fireworks were on. This was a problem as Emily and I had been avoiding all online showings of Happily Ever After so that we could watch it for the first time live. So as we bolted for the exit, we did our best not to look up or indeed listen to what was going on! We must have looked a bit strange, head down, shouting instructions to each other, trying to avoid the gathered crowds whilst only looking at the pavement.

The other concern of course was that the fireworks would finish, and thousands of folks would start heading for the exit too, so this was a full paced extraction. We still took the resort monorail as the queue looked shorter and we were soon back at the car.

Right, time to get back on plan! Applebees it said and Applebees we would do.

We did the one on the 192 and were pleasingly seated immediately. More pleasing for those not driving was the news that it was two for one on most alcoholic drinks.

There were so many flying about that I lost track of what they were.

This one is actually Tom’s milkshake. He has an addiction problem, and this is it.

 

 

Freddie was alseep so we had brought him in still in his car seat. Applebees had an ingenious contraption that could be placed at the end of the table that we could rest that on so he wasn’t on the floor.

The fact that the only child in our party was out of it did not stop us from commissioning something from the wandering balloon person.

 

Yes, even at my age, I can still get Woody.

We ordered some appetisers as it had been several hours since our life threatening amount of food at Toothsome.

Me and Emily shared some nachos. Louise and Mikey had some Mozzarella sticks.

For mains we had –

Me – Thai Salad

Louise, Mikey and Emily – Various Pasta things

 

Tom – Club Sandwich

Rebecca – Boneless Wings

Who knows why I didn’t photograph those!

It was all superb. I know Applebees isn’t fine dining but it is good fun, great quality and at $200 including a 20% tip great value too. Full and tired I got us back home and we were in bed by 11.20.

Till the next time…..

 

Freddie’s First Florida Fiesta – Day Two 30th August 2018

For the second day in a row I was awake at 4am. I really, really tried to go back to sleep today but failed miserably and I was up and about by 4.30. Freddie and Tom were already in the pool. Tom had fallen asleep a couple of hours before I did last night so no doubt he had been awake for hours by now.

I had some cereal for breakfast and Tom had his Outback meal from last night. That’s the right way to start a holiday.

Freddie had some toast.

As ever, no matter what stupid hour we are awake on this first day we still end up leaving for the parks later than desired. Despite me knowing that a 7.45 departure was already behind schedule, as the car was half full of first timers I shunned the Sherberth Road route and went down the 192 to World Drive so that they could experience the sign on the first journey to Magic Kingdom.

Rebecca did a fine job of capturing the moment.

and other important landmarks.

We were early (but not early enough, which would be a theme for a lot of the holiday) and were able to park close enough not to require a tram. We walked in to the TTC and security took quite a while. We of course took the monorail as nobody should be taking the ferry on the first day unless, unlike us, you arrived with plenty of time!

Once off the monorail, after emotional first views of the castle, we were quickly through the entrance and soaking in those wonderful first morning vibes…yes, I said vibes.

As we got to the start of Main Street proper, there was a trolley show just starting. Whilst everyone stopped to watch that I nipped into the Emporium to secure all the badges we needed. Rebecca needed a birthday badge as this trip was her 21st birthday present and I also got three 1st Visit badges for Tom, Freddie and Mikey.

As I returned, the show was just ending and Rebecca burst into tears. The emotion of being back here got to her, and when asked she confessed that now having Freddie with her had pushed her over the emotional edge. Emily is normally the cryer!

Now you get it” I said to her in my own special patronising way.

We all then went back into the Emporium for the procurement of magic bands. I was very happy thank you very much, with my grey plain one I got for free at the Beach Club last year. Everyone else, even those with previous bandage, seemed hell-bent on getting a new one.

With selections made, with a blunt reminder from me that time was limited and they needed to “just pick one”, we paid. The octogenarian behind the till was asked if he could/would link them for us. He didn’t refuse as such, but pointed out that we could do this via the app. Before I could stop everyone they were all downloading and logging into the app and trying to do just that. I was trying to tell everyone that it wouldn’t work as I had all the tickets on my account. A few error messages later and the task was abandoned as the show was starting at the castle. We would sort it all out later.

As the show ended, we headed left into Adventureland.

See…

We arrived at what would be Freddie’s first ever WDW ride and Rebecca and Tom went off to park the stroller.

There was of course no queue at this time and we were soon riding with Freddie transferred to his contraption.

We had all wondered how he might react to the rides, with Pirates being a decent first test. It is dark, has some loud noises and a gentle drop or two. He was such a cool customer. He just took it all in with a great deal of curiosity.

We continued round to Splash next and Louise volunteered to sit out with Freddie whilst the rest of us took advantage of the walk on.

After riding, our plan to also do Big Thunder was thwarted by a thirty minute wait time so instead we wandered down towards Haunted Mansion for which we had a FastPass. On the way, we called in at the Ticket Office in Liberty Square. I had never noticed this before but I wondered if they could sort out our Magic Band woes from earlier.

They could. The CM there was incredibly helpful and armed with his tablet device he scanned and tapped away until we were all linked up to our bands and still retained all our links on my account so I could book stuff for everyone. I apologised for the technical incompetence but he said we’d been given a bum steer by the guy who sold us the bands and he should have either sorted it for us or asked a few more questions to understand what we needed to do.

We were a little peckish now following our very early breakfast so we stopped at Sleepy Hollow for sugarific treats.

I had a Churro sandwich and it was all kinds of incredible.

Mikey had a strawberry waffle

Emily a Nutella Waffle and Louise a Breakfast Waffle, both of which I failed to capture as I was in mid-churro orgasm.

Freddie was allowed a little piece of heaven.

So now, all smacked up on sugar snacks, we used our Haunted Mansion FastPass. Freddie again took it all in his stride and didn’t seem fazed or frightened by any of it.

We availed ourselves of the Tangled toilets before making our way to It’s A Small World. There was no queue, and this, it seemed to me anyway, was Freddie’s favourite ride of the whole trip. We rode it a few times and he was totally engrossed each time.

As we retrieved Freddie’s stroller from it’s parking spot, as his body made contact with it, he fell asleep. The benefits of doing WDW at ten months old!

So again, Louise volunteered to sunbathe whilst looking after him. The rest of us piled into Philharmagic after a ten minute wait as a show had just started. It was weird having to describe what a ride/show was before going in when asked by one of our first timers. For this one, I think I went with Disney’s Greatest Hits in 4D.

As we exited it was raining so we loitered in the shop whilst messaging Louise to see where she was sheltering. She was under a brolly outside Pinocchio’s Village Haus so we scampered over there. We took the chance to lunch whilst it rained and we had some cover and I, for the first time, mobile ordered our lunches. We all had flatbreads or nuggets I think and it was about $80.

Mikey seemed to enjoy it.

Fed and watered (again) it was now time for our Big Thunder FastPass so we walked back that way. Rebecca and Tom used theirs first and the rest of us waited in the very, very hot sunshine. I parked Freddie up in the shade and loitered by his stroller so that nobody pinched him or thought him abandoned.

A Canadian lady had taken it upon herself to have a chat with Mikey and Louise, attracted by his 1st Visit badge. She was a veteran and shared stories of her travels and asked what he was making of things.

With Rebecca and Tom off the ride, the rest of us did the same.

There was some filming going on in and around the ride, and as we were about to board this lot were let on from the opposite side of the track, so they enjoyed one of my best glares.

The guy in front, with the Rays shirt, seemed to be regretting several life choices at that moment.

It surely is the wildest ride in the wilderness.

We had a message as we left saying that Freddie was having his lunch over at Tall Tales so we joined them there. Once he was fed (he is never really full!) we made our way down to Main Street (one of these times we might work out a route that doesn’t involve constantly crisscrossing the park) as we were going to get Freddie his first hair cut at the barbers.

We couldn’t get in immediately but I was able to reserve a slot for 2.40 which would follow on nicely from the parade. So we took our spot on the pavement outside, right at the end of the parade route just as the Grand Marshalls were coming past. Yeh, we were better at it.

Then the band came by.

And the rest followed.

Freddie was sweaty but happy watching it go by.

Ariel had missed me, it was clear.

Tinkerbell seemed to be regretting that Mexican last night……

That’s better!

With the parade done we made our way back to the barbers.

Freddie was soon in position.

Here is the video if you want to watch it.

With that done, we were all set and ready to go.

With first day tiredness creeping up on us we decided to head out and have a rest before our ADR at Whispering Canyon in a couple of hours. We got the resort monorail and headed for the Contemporary for a drink in the Outer Rim.

Cocktails for all but me and Freddie were ordered.

We sat and chatted and rested for a bit.

Soon it was time to head to Wilderness Lodge, so we monorailed back to the TTC and walked to the car for the short drive. Well, it would have been shorter had the new road system for Magic Kingdom resorts not confused me, but we did some sight seeing in the surrounding area and we were still on time for our ADR….just.

With a 5pm reservation we were the first in the place, so we were a little worried that the famous atmosphere may be lacking. However, it soon filled up and all was well.

We had an excellent server who looked after us very well with just enough shenanigans to make things fun. We all had the unlimited skillet thing and enjoyed it a lot.

Tom & Mikey took advantage of the unlimited milkshakes.

We had some Nachos to start, just in case an unlimited amount of food wouldn’t be enough.

Some salad arrived, sat around on the table for a bit until the server came and removed it again.

Then the real action began.

Special mention for the corn bread which we actually doggy bagged as we couldn’t eat it all.

Freddie was a fan.

And of his Dad’s milkshake.

Despite eating huge amounts, Tom and Mikey opted to have a dessert too. It was a chocolate something and they almost finished them.

Tired and so full we might die, we trudged to the car, called at the Pharmacy as we would seem to do at least once a day from here on in, and got home at 7.15.

Louise and Mikey went in the pool for a short while but everyone else took their food babies to bed very early.

Till the next time….

Skecher Buy Golly Wow

Before we do this, I should warn you that this one may be longer than anything you’ve been used to.

Look at that. Even the innuendo engine is getting a warm up as we near take off.

Seriously though, this one goes on a bit and if you’ve ever (always) read these posts, marvelling at how sad I am that I spend so much time and effort over planning stuff, then this one may not be for you. This, dear reader, goes to a whole new level.

By the way, at Louise’s request I have added a few links to Disney terms in this post for folks reading this that are not au fait with da lingo.

Firstly, the important stuff.

Ryan is home and he will ride again. The lady did a great job on him and he is literally as good as new. You can all now rest easy.

Shit got real this week. It’s probably about time that I started blogging about my upcoming holiday don’t you think? You all must be dying to hear some of the detail by now.

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Tuesday saw the start of our FastPass+ journey, and it wasn’t good. It would be very sad if I had booked a meeting room at work to retire to just before 12pm so that I could concentrate fully on the task at hand. Yep, it would. These things are too important to be interrupted by a phone call or work based emergency.

On the off-chance that Disney would open up the date I was waiting on earlier than expected, I sat refreshing the site for a while, before finally seeing the new date appear at exactly 12pm.

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Bloody sticklers. Here we go, I thought, I’ll just quickly nab three passes and be on my way.

I am sorry to say that the site on which FastPasses are booked is not, or certainly was not on this day, fit for purpose. It was continually crashing, often so tantalisingly close to the end of the process that I almost cancelled the whole holiday. OK, maybe not, but it was bobbins.

After about ten minutes of frustrating red-faced repetition there was still no sign of success. Ooh, more innuendo…..once it is unleashed there is nothing to stop it…..ahh, now I am in an endless innuendo loop.

After a further twenty minutes I finally had one in the bag for Haunted Mansion, at 10:05. As pages loaded and then vanished, all I was seeing was the list of available attractions shrinking as my blood pressure and frustration grew. The whimsical error pages that Disney use when things go wrong were very quickly losing their appeal.

It was almost forty minutes after 12 that the site seemed to settle down and I was able to finish the job. I bagged Big Thunder Mountain at 12:25 and then, with Freddie in mind, Dumbo at 2:20. I totally understand why this could be an alien concept to normal holiday makers, but all these bookings fell nicely into place, not by accident I should say, with our plans for the day. Yes, I have planned to this very sad level of detail, mainly because I can. Knowing the park layouts so well, and how the day generally goes, my thinking is this.

We should be there before the park opens, and after a wander around the shops on Main Street and an inevitable Starbucks, position ourselves near Casey’s for rope drop. We shall saunter, nonchalantly left, using the stroller as a weapon of mass destruction across the bridge into Adventureland for Freddie’s first ever ride in a Disney theme park, on Pirates. With that being  pretty much a walk on, he said confidently, we shall then continue our journey to Splash Mountain, where the standby wait should still be tolerable and we can hopefully get that under the belt too. Of course, Freddie will have to sit this one out.

That should then allow us to wander down to Haunted Mansion for 10am ish to use our first FastPass. By then we’re at 10.30 and if previous first days are any form of precedent then we’ll need lunch, which I haven’t planned. I’m not a monster!

We shall probably eat, drink and see what we get on in Fantasyland, such as Philharmagic, the Carousel, and It’s A Small World should wait times be bearable.

Then our Big Thunder FastPass kicks in so we can walk back up there for that before amusing ourselves until the 2pm parade. The previous travel day and time difference will be kicking in by now and we’ll hopefully just manage our Dumbo FastPass before heading for the exit.

We have a 5pm Whispering Canyon ADR, so we’ll have to make a call at this point whether we try to get back to the villa for a shower and change or, if time is short, we do something like head over to the Contemporary for a drink in the Outer Rim bar. It has been declared that this place serves the best Long Island Ice Teas on the planet and this may be the only time we have this trip to get to sample one, apart from the mug who is driving.

I know this level of detail may sound nuts, but with a lot of expensively acquired experience and knowledge it’s possible and for me totally sensible. Hopefully it makes the day smoother, less stressful and more rewarding for all concerned. As long as time is allowed within this mental level of over planning for the metaphorical smelling of roses, photos in front of the castle and other good stuff all should be well.

The following day saw similar levels of thought and….

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We’ll be at Epcot, but not until the late afternoon/evening. Again, experience tells me that we suffer on day two. The jet lag, journey and adrenaline of day one can make another full day in a park a bit of a strain. So we’ll be at the villa for most of the day, celebrating my birthday a bit until our Beaches & Cream ADR at 3:50. I could only get four of us in for that so if the others can’t get a walk in we’ll eat elsewhere. So we expect to be in the park from around 5:30. When trying to slot some late in the day FastPasses in, thought was needed. The last thing you want to be doing is crisscrossing the park, so a route is needed.

With this in mind I secured The Seas with Nemo & Friends at 5:45. We can enter via International Gateway, wander down to Canada and watch Martin Short before I cry at the song. We will then make our way down to Nemo. We can then take our time to get back up to World Showcase, no doubt via Mousegear, to start the traditional tour of the World Showcase pavilions for my birthday. Of course, that allows us to do Frozen and a FastPass is sorted for 7:30. With ROE not until 10pm that day, that should give us enough time to wander most of the showcase before ending up in “our spot” on the bridge near France to watch the fireworks. We did have a spare FastPass slot left but there’s no point in cramming one in just for the sake of it. We probably wouldn’t get time to use it and that just means some other folks who would might miss out.

The next day we could book for this week oddly would see us in Epcot again (don’t question my planning!). Yes, don’t, as I honestly can’t remember why.

Anyway, this is a full-ish day in Epcot allowing for a later start due to the late ROE the night before. So again, thinking of a sensible route between FastPasses, we start with Spaceship Earth at 11:50 followed by (I am chuffed to say) Soarin’ at 12:25. That is always the prize FastPass for us, despite Louise’s trepidation and fear of “flying”.

In a blaze of glory we then move on to Mission Space at 2:35, timed perfectly just before we eat at Via Napoli at 3:40, saving us revisiting our food somewhere on the way to Mars. Whether we will be able to get on Test Track via standby or single rider, we shall see. One cannot be too greedy of course.

Yesterday we were able to book for the 3rd of September and that is Hollywood Studios and Labor Day too. I had to drop Emily off at the train station just before 12 as she was heading to London to watch Heathers. This meant that I was in central Manchester at 12, reliant on 4G and a following wind to secure what could be a tricky set of Fastpasses as, with Toy Story Land open, this would likely be the busiest park of our trip.

It was effortless. Aside from Slinky Dog being immediately unavailable a few seconds after 12pm, I easily secured Tower of Terror, Toy Story Mania and Rock n Rollercoaster. I was pretty pleased with that. With that first one running until 10.35 we may be able to endure a bit of a queue to get onto Slinky if we are at the park for opening. We’ll see.

With FastPasses done for as far as I can do them, thoughts then moved on to other pressing matters. Yesterday was also new trainers day. They have to be bought a few weeks prior to departure so that they can be worn in nicely. After last year’s change from the traditional all white affairs, I must admit that I am now sold on a Skecher and wanted another pair of those. Usually, I buy everything online, but trainers, for a WDW trip have to be tried on in person. I cannot over emphasise the importance of comfortable footwear and no chances can be taken.

With that in mind, after dropping Emily off I headed for some actual shops. I ended up in Bolton town centre and despite living here all my life, I did not recognise the place. A few fruitless shop visits later and I was relying on google to find somewhere that actually stocked Skechers. My last resort was Debenhams and they had at least three pairs to choose from.

It was like a scene from Are You Being Served with an actual person attending to me, getting the right size from the back and at some point almost trying to apply some sales techniques to close the sale.

I walked away with a pair of comfy loveliness just in time to get back to my car before my 80p of parking ran out.

 

With that daring show of leg, I’m done, as I suspect are you.

Till the next time….

Book Cover

A Sentimental Journey

Thanks to everyone for your best wishes for my Dad. He came out of hospital on Monday, feeling a million times better than when he went in, with a new collection of pills to add to his daily intake.

An unexpected planning milestone happened last week. There I was minding my own business after work on Friday, contemplating how on earth I had made it through the endless week just gone, and looking forward to the week off I had booked for next week, browsing some social media. A post appeared about a Floridatix sale on theme park tickets, so I gave it a click, expecting to be baited and switched as is often the case with these promos.

Whilst the saving won’t be changing my retirement plans, the discount was worth an earlier than planned investment. Our 14 day ultimate was priced at £350 (until the end of Monday if that helps anyone) and after browsing some competitor sites and seeing them at anything from £390 to £365 I took the plunge. It was helpful that they could be reserved for a tenner each and so we’re done for tickets nice and early with the balance to pay in July. Lovely stuff.

Did I mention that it’s been another long, weary week? This business of not having holidayed for over 12 months now seems to be taking its toll. We should never do that again. It is a default position of course, but I am missing the comforting embrace of Florida. As the doctor recently confirmed, my body is yearning for its orange ball of Vitamin D to warm my bones and ease my cares. My cholesterol levels are in danger of dipping back into normal parameters, so I need at least two weeks of calorific carnage to avoid that at all costs.

At times, as I sit in another one of *those* meetings, attempting to convince everyone, but mostly myself, that I am interested and engaged, I can find myself drifting mentally to a certain scenario. It differs, I guess depending upon my mood or memory, but usually it is something like this.

It is just after dusk. I am on the monorail as it glides silently past the Grand Floridian stop, heading for the Magic Kingdom. The sky is still a little red, burned with the after glow of the sunset, and all around the Seven Seas Lagoon lights twinkle, giving the scene a magical glow.

Inside the monorail, the familiar bings and bongs sound and the chocolate voiced announcer wraps me up in the comfort his familiar words.

We all exchange a knowing glance to recognise the significance of that random phrase.

The early evening atmosphere of the just gone dark gives the place a whole new feel. The doors open now as we alight at the Magic Kingdom and more lights twinkle as we wander down the ramp towards the promise of a night of memories and mice. There’s a hint of as yet unrecognisable music drifting on the breeze towards us. The still warm temperatures relax my body as unusually it does not need to tense against a chill and the world feels full of wonder and possibilities.

The walk up Main Street is a familiar one and the castle draws us in like a tractor beam, changing colour behind the endless procession of folks taking those photos that will stand on mantelpieces and desks the world over. This visit is a relaxed one, it feels like it is later in the holiday, we’ve done the commando stuff earlier in the trip and the rides have been done. This is all about soaking in the place, absorbing it into our blood streams, saving it up for protection against the grey, cold winter months away from this place. We inevitably end up at the partners statue and take yet another photograph to add to all the others. All of this is familiar and unique in equal measure, and that may well be the ethos and appeal of WDW in one short phrase.

A moment is taken to just sit and watch. Every person passing has this going on. They may not know it yet, but all this will come back to them in a meeting, in a moment of grief or in a conversation with a friend. I’ll be part of it, a small cog in what made their trip what it was, and they part of mine. Families of all shapes, sizes and nationality experiencing the same thing in their own unique way.

Of course, most of them will be doing it wrong, but hey, what can you do? 🙂

All of this is a mashup made up of a hundred memories from different times. As Rebecca reminded me the other day, this trip will be her 18th. Even I hadn’t imagined the number to be that high, but I am more happy than ashamed of that! I can’t begin to compute my total, well I could, but it would take a while.

I told you I was missing it. You’d never know it though would you?

Till the next time….

To Siesta Key…And Beyond Tour 2017 – Day Sixteen April 26th 2017

Just like that we get to our last full day of the holiday. See, I told you we needed more time in WDW!!

For anybody who has read any of my previous trip reports (available now from your local Amazon) you will know that there is only ever one place any such last day can be spent. Today, we Magic Kingdom.

Desperate to eek out every last second my body roused itself at 7am. With only the hour to get everyone ready and out of the door we set off for the Kingdom. We had arranged to meet Mum & Dad there so there was no need to detour for a pick up.

We flaunted our on-site specialness to avoid the $50 parking fee or whatever it was that week and parked up in Simba 110.

You don’t need me to tell you whereabouts in that row we were sent to park.

A tram arrived very promptly and whisked us away.

We encountered the (then) brand new security at the TTC rather than at the park gates and it worked well.

See I told you we were early.

Our earliness conspired against us at this point as the monorail was either not yet open or having early morning difficulties and so we were forced to catch the ferry. This is strictly verbotten (this is not the German version of the popular dancing show) as it “feels” like it takes longer to get to where you need to be. With no option other than a brisk swim, we waited.

Our goal was now to be seen off in the distance.

I mentally studied my fellow guests working out who I would be able to man handle out of the way should it come to that to make sure we got on the next ferry. Luckily, my Van Damme tactics were not required.

Once through the gates, having just missed the park opening show (thanks monorail) we made our way to Space Mountain.

There were signs that this could be a busy day.

With a little bit of local knowledge from the odd trip we’ve done before, rather than walk all the way up to the hub ans across the main bridge into Tomorrowland, we turned right past The Plaza and cut through the noodle station thing that is open about three times a year.

That’s better.

As we approached the ride it was already showing a twenty-minute wait which I didn’t believe. Louise, starting to panic that today would be the last sunshine she may see for many months, chose to sit in it rather than ride so it was just Emily and I who walked straight on.

Twenty minutes…pah!

I screamed my way round as usual with the not uncommon thought at the back of my mind that this is now a very old ride and perhaps my considerable girth may be the straw that breaks the camel’s back and sends our car flying off the rails to an untimely death. Still, I enjoyed it.

We wandered across to Buzz now and again walked on without any form of wait.

I got an average 137,000 which was paltry compared to Emily’s score but frankly she had cheated by reading online about where all the high scoring targets are. I made a mental note to do the same before we return.

It was now time for a healthy and nutritious breakfast to set us up for a long day. Coffee was a must so we went to the Joffreys stand not far away. I did not know that Disney had bought the Game of Thrones franchise. I can’t wait for the Dwarf Sex attraction at the Hollywood Studios.

You weren’t expecting anything other than this for my breakfast were you?

More full of sugar than my T-shirt was of me we made it across to do Philharmagic.

The show wasn’t full but I still hated everyone who decided it was fine to sit wherever they wished. What do they think this is, some sort of holiday?

As we left Mum & Dad arrived just in time to use our FastPass for Mine Train. A rare treat for us, being a first time ride.

It’s a great addition to the park and a ride with some nice touches and a good mix of roller coaster and dark ride. I approve, which must be a huge relief to everyone at Disney.

We walked and rolled (Dad having an ECV again) over to Liberty Square in need of a drink. As we bought our stuff we noticed some of these wandering about…

There was a mild panic as one got seperated from its Mum for a few minutes but eventually all was well and we could move on with our day.

We continued on towards Splash Mountain, but being early (it’s a rare theme today) we did Big Thunder, tolerating a thirty minute standby queue.

That’s not Dad in his ECV by the way.

The queue area has been “interactivated” since our last trip so it was interesting to see that and a good reason why I didn’t choose to FastPass this ride sixty odd days ago. Honest!

I wonder how much these Cog’s worth? Ba Dum Tish.

Now, as if all this stuff is planned months in advance, our FastPass slot for Splash was open.

Out of around a dozen photos I took on this ride, this was the best…

I shall let you imagine the horrific incompetence of all the others.

We walked through Adventure Land back to the castle where I redeemed my photographic self with this one.

and these aren’t too bad…

This spot right here is one of my very favourites on the planet.

As we wandered the hub a dance party show thing (probably not the correct title) started so we watched that for a bit.

We continued our loop back towards Buzz as we now had a FastPass for that.

Same castle, different side.

Now, THAT’S a fanny pack to admire.

I’m not entirely sure what Emily was doing here…

I think her Nana may have just put some ice down the back of her top. This tit for tat game started on some trip many years ago and continues to this day….

We did Buzz again, with scores that I shan’t bother anyone with.

With being such a long time since I had any sugar, ice-cream was required from the place next to the Merchant of Venus, which sounds very similar to one of the pay per view films on offer in  a hotel I stayed in with work.

Despite Emily’s mortal fear of ever being selected to appear on one of the screens in the show, we did the Laugh Floor next. She escaped that experience and we all enjoyed the show again.

At the FastPass kiosk thing across the road I secured us a Haunted Mansion ride for a little later in the day. Always planning you see.

We had a sit down and a rest on the People Mover now.

Next we walked over to Liberty Square to find a decent spot to watch the 3 o’clock parade, which was due to start at 3 o’clock!

Before it did, there was some marching band action. Again, my mind goes back to those pay per view films that I have never watched.

Some impressive horn there…again my mind goes…oh never mind.

Then the parade proper got going and we had a great view…

Ariel looks very pleased with her nice fork….again my mind…..enough!

Ariel here, wondering why I never call her anymore….

I could have been mistaken but I think Peter said something about Hook and a huge anchor?

With perfect timing our recently secured FastPass for the Haunted Mansion now opened up. Seriously, I hope someone is appreciating these ninja planning skills.

After exchanging my fuel rod (not a euphemism) we made our way to the exit to catch the boat over to Fort Wilderness for our dinner reservation.

It took us twenty-five minutes from leaving the park to get there.

Emily sat next to Doc Brown I think.

We checked in and had a drink on the porch where we bumped into Catriona again and had a chat.

We were soon seated and let loose on the buffet.

To avoid shaming myself, several photos have been omitted from this part of the trip report. Let’s just say I was very full.

With the seams of my clothes straining to hold everything together we wandered back towards the boat, saying hello to a horse on the way.

A boat was kindly waiting for us and got us back to the Magic Kingdom at…

We spent the next hour or so browsing the shops. Emily had her heart set on a Dooney and Bourke bag (since she was about eleven) and now being all employed and stuff she had the required dollars to do so.

This is the one she chose.

We got some more gifts for Rebecca before heading off to ride Pirates. The park was fairly busy now as everyone was staking out spots for one of the final Wishes. Somehow between Main Street and Pirates we lost Mum. Dad circled back on his mean machine but to no avail. Whilst he continued the search, the rest of us rode.

During the ride my phone buzzed with a message from Dad. Whilst scouring the vast expanses of the Magic Kingdom the battery on his ECV had run out and he was now stranded somewhere close to the Aladdin carpet ride. Thinking that you couldn’t make this up and I was never this much bother when they took me to WDW as a child, we left the ride and went to rescue him.

Thankfully both Mum and a kindly cast member had found him and the latter had radioed for a new ECV to be brought out for him. As this took a whole ten minutes the lovely cast member gave all of us a FastPass for Big Thunder. I had waited with Dad for his new vehicle to arrive whilst the others wandered to the hub to stake out a spot in which Emily could weep uncontrollably as we watched Wishes for the last ever time.

We joined them there and began the hour or so wait before the show. Thirsty and hot I wandered off, almost back to Pirates to secure us all some drinks. Emily certainly needed to stock up on fluids before Wishes started. As it did, so did the tears and she was absolutely heartbroken throughout.

We both had goes at comforting her…

but she was beyond any help.

As usual my photos were not great so here is the video if anyone wants to have a watch.

I’m not sure if you can hear Emily crying in it.

We needed another drink at this point so off I went again and I got back just in time for the projection show at 9.45.

By the time that had ended we were all spent. It was too late to do the FastPass we were given by the cast member so we headed for the exit full of emotion and last day melancholy.

I turned at the end of Main Street to soak in the last few moments…

Before finally admitting to myself that we really did need to leave after an awesome last day. This part of a trip always gets me right in the feels. Memories, nostalgia, wondering if (yeh right!) or when we may return makes for a lumpy throat. This place is embedded deep within our family and leaving for the last time is always an emotional time.

We jumped on the resort monorail as the other one was rammed and we were quickly back at the TTC, on the next tram and back out to the car. We dropped Mum & Dad off and wearily made our way back to the Beach Club. We all collapsed into bed having done a good few steps today!

See you next week for the joyous recollection of our packing and travelling day, without the aid of any notes whatsoever!

Till the next time…..


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What Would You Wish For?

Who’d want to be a Disney Imagineer eh? Well, me for a start. For location alone it’s in my all time top four dream jobs just behind millionaire, musician and best selling author. As good as the job seems they and in turn Disney will, in my view, always be between rocks and hard places when it comes to developing the rides and attractions. The challenge of keeping up with the noisy neighbours at Universal, introducing new stuff to keep folks coming back as well as retaining the magic and memories that everyone is so attached to is a delicate balance to maintain.

I will personally never forgive the Imagineers responsible for Stich’s Great Escape, but that’s one aberration in a long line of success.

This quandry was brought to mind this week when I saw a rumour posted into my Facebook timeline (thanks Val Ramsey!). The article suggested that Disney were testing a new fireworks show at the Magic Kingdom, postulating that this may be to replace Wishes.

Now, that is just a guess and is a million miles from confirmed. They could just be testing the fireworks for the Christmas stuff they do which will be starting soon, but a new fireworks show could make some sense.

  1. There is currently no night-time parade at MK and they need to announce one for when the Halloween and Christmas parades finish. A new set of fireworks could fit into that.
  2. Wishes has been around for a good while now and it could be due a refresh.

Now something like this is going to draw mixed reactions from the Disney faithful. For some, like Emily, their reaction is horror and instant mourning for something that hasn’t yet died. For Emily, Wishes is all she has known so perhaps the reluctance for change is understandable. For others of course there’s excitement and anticipation for what may be to come. I honesty can’t remember what came before Wishes but I know I will have seen it and as sad as it may be for Wishes to be retired, I do wonder what the next generation of fireworks show may look like. I’d expect Disney to up the ante though with technology now being available that wasn’t when Wishes came along.

There have also been rumours that Paint The Night will come to the Magic Kingdom so of course nobody really knows, unless you’re the boss at Magic Kingdom. I guess we’ll find out soon enough. Some folks have even been bold enough to suggest that there will not be a replacement parade at all. Claims that cost cutting will be at the root of this drastic action. Personally, I cannot see that at all. The Magic Kingdom and parades are synonymous, and I just can’t contemplate that Disney would be so silly as to break that tradition.

Whatever happens I’m confident enough to trust that Disney will get it right. The nighttime activities at MK are a show piece event and they have to maintain a standard so that it will mesmerise and entertain their audience, as well of course, making sure it makes a good proportion of them cry, or maybe that’s just Emily?

In twenty years or so, when some other idiot is blogging about Disney changing whatever does or doesn’t come next, there will be a similarly split reaction I’m sure and I just hope I’m still going there to see whatever it is.

So, time for your thoughts, what do you want Disney to do?

Till the next time…..

The Adults Only Tour 2015 – Day Eighteen

Day Eighteen – 13th September

For any serial WDW visitor, there’s a phrase which strikes fear and dread into their hearts.

Last full day.

Here we are, after all this time, with just one more day here. Those of you who know anything about us will probably be able to guess which park we would spend such an occasion in. We were headed for Magic Kingdom of course, but aiming to be consistent with the rest of the trip we obviously decided to have a lie in. To be fair, my notes tell me I had a rough night, probably brought on by the thought of not only our last full day, but leaving one of my daughters behind too.

With this unintentional lie in I found myself on the PC shifting our FastPass bookings to later in the day. Of course, by doing this on the day I was now booking FastPasses for the monorail and to watch a trash can get emptied on Main Street.

With the morning a bit of a write off some packing happened and with that pretty much done we left the villa at 12.30. This wasn’t as bad as you may think as we wanted to stay until parades and fireworks tonight so this later start may give us a fighting chance.

It was raining. The weather making its own comment on the mood surrounding the end of the trip. We parked in Scar 119 and were in full poncho as we trammed into the TTC.

As we left the monorail the rain stopped. It is where dreams come true after all. I had my sack handled by an elderly US gent for the last time, Ryan had a cigarette and recovered as we took some photos.

As usual at the end of our summer trips, Halloween was in full effect on Main Street.

More photos happened as there was a definite sense of the impending departure minus one of our party.

Here we see what happens when two different people are taking your photo at the same time.

All trip I had been putting off visits to certain shops using the excuse that we needed to wait until Emily had her Cast Member discount, and then when that ran out, the age old “I don’t want to carry that around all day so we’ll come back at the end of the holiday”. Today neither of those were any good so we spent more time than I would ever want to in the Pandora shop on Main Street. Louise bought some earrings that were worth more than her actual ears.

Nana and Grandad spent some time chatting with a Cast Member in the shop whilst Louise and the girls spent more time choosing jewellery than we did our last house.

Of course having arrived at the park half way through the day, every ride had wait times almost as long as the time we spent in the Pandora shop. So we deployed the “everything is busy” strategy of wandering about and looking at stuff. The first thing we looked at was the new Circus area where Mickey and Minnie’s house used to be.

There’s a feeling that this isn’t for us as we no longer have children to which this relevant. Stuff moves on of course, but I will forever have Mickey’s house in my heart alongside the mental images of my very young girls within it.

We decided to catch the train and do a loop of the park.

As we waited for the train there was a rescue situation. A tiny turtle was sat on the rail of the train track about to find out that its shell was no match for a couple of tonnes of train. The Cast Member on the platform was told about it and he bravely made his way out onto the tracks and moved it on into the bushes, thereby saving a few hundred kids an experience that may well have scarred them for life.

Just in time….

We stopped at Main Street but didn’t get off.

We alighted (got off) at Splash Mountain and went into the shop there as we certainly weren’t getting on the ride. Inevitable hat trying ensued.

We bought Emily a fluffy blanket that had a hood. An essential I think you’ll agree.

We walked past Splash heading for Country Bear Jamboree. Yep, that’s how busy all the real rides were.

Having not seen this in years and of course Sarah never had, we enjoyed it more than we thought we might. We made our way then over to the new area to find Gaston about to appear. However, his queue was already full and closed to new guests, so instead we loitered at the front of the queue watching him interact with those who had waited since last week to see him.

Gaston found time to flirt with the girls as he spotted them taking photos of him.

Thankfully we were now approaching one of our FastPass times so we slowly wandered down to Space Mountain taking more photos as we did.

We did the People Mover to kill the last bit of time and to rest our legs.

At 5.05 we got on our first ride of the day, but to be honest we felt no sense of having not had a nice day so far. Sometimes it’s about where you are, not what you’re doing.

Space Mountain was fast and bumpy and my notes classified it as “full clench”.

Nana and Grandad had gone shopping rather than ride the mountain so we now met them on Main Street as we were now, having done one ride, heading out for our evening meal. We caught the boat headed for Trail’s End.

 

This is one of the nicest ways to make your way to food.

We arrived at 6.05 and checked in for our 6.15 reservation.

This is a buffet affair and so what followed was bordering on warfare. There are no photos as what happened was not pretty. Having gone all in on the superb food, dessert was not an option, but to be fair, the corn bread was cake anyway.

As we left we spent a little bit of time talking to the horse bloke. I suspect that isn’t his official title.

As we waited for the boat back to Magic Kingdom my favourite time of day, in my favourite place happened and for once my camera did a half decent job of capturing it.

Dusk in and around Magic Kingdom is just lovely.

The beauty of those photos were stark contrast to the absolute chaos that we found on Main Street. The first parade was about to happen and it was just madness. Keeping a party of seven together was a challenge but we somehow made it all the way to Thunder Mountain and used our FastPass.

By the time we had done that it was 8.45 and we headed for Main Street again to try and find an inch of space to watch Wishes and the parade. It was brutal. Busy does not describe it. We found a spot literally half way up Main Street in the middle of the street.

About here…

I have long since given up trying to capture Wishes on camera and we just stood and watched full of all sorts of emotions. Emily cried throughout.

Afterwards Louise and I had to battle the shops to buy gifts for everyone we hadn’t yet whilst everyone else went to find somewhere to watch the parade. That shopping experience wasn’t pleasant. The shops resembled a crowd scene from Ghandi but somehow we gave Disney a large amount of money and left to find the others.

By some miracle they had managed to secure a spot up on the balcony near the train station. After a ten minute wait the parade started and from the few hundred photos I attempted here are the few worth sharing.

Leaving the park was expectedly chaotic and we opted to take the resort monorail as the normal one was just madness. The trams were also packed and after a fair bit of waiting we finally got on one and got back to our car at 11. As we had sat on the tram waiting for the 612 safety announcements and checks there was a family in the queue going absolutely mental at the family sat in front of us. It was all in Spanish so I don’t know what they were saying, but they were clearly upset that they had not been able to board. As the family in front of us didn’t speak Spanish either most of the tirade was wasted. Everyone was tired and emotional at this stage.

We stopped off at CVS on the way home for water and some throat spray….yes I was STILL ill. We were in bed by 12 completely spent.

Till the next time……

The Adults Only Tour 2015 – Day Three

Day Three – August 29th

The novelty of the 4am wake up had worn off at this point. I’m all for it on the first morning as the excitement of getting to a park for the first time numbs the pain of the lack of sleep, but by now, to be honest, I’d rather be sleeping.

Having said that, I was asleep by about 7pm last night so it was to be expected I suppose.

I tossed and turned until about 5am, which made a right mess of the bed sheets. I booted up the villa’s PC, made a brew and a bagel and came back to see it still trying its best. Once online I started doing what every male at a PC does when alone in the wee small hours. I tried to locate a shop that sold trainers. It’s an odd fetish, sure, but I’m not doing anyone any harm.

Louise had “forgotten” her trainers. When I was charging around the house on the day we left at another ungodly hour, before nipping out to pick Sarah up and ensuring that everyone who had been incapable of setting an alarm was actually awake, Louise had casually mentioned that her trainers were in the coat cupboard in the kitchen and could I put them in the case. I forgot/didn’t have time and now it was my fault that she had none and we had to go shopping this morning to get some.

Having located a shop that looked to stock cheap trainers, other folks started to rise around 6am. Rebecca and Sarah took a dip in the pool, which was allowed as we were not due to leave the villa till mid-morning. Traditionally day two is a rest day, but as we’d only been able to get a Be Our Guest reservation today, for lunch, we had to return to the Magic Kingdom, like it or not. The plan was to arrive just before lunch, do BOG and then pick up whatever rides we could despite the crowds.

Just the four and half short hours after I was awake, Louise and I left for the trainer shop. It was about a ten minute drive and after a similar amount of time we realised that the Payless Store was named such as it stocked shite I wouldn’t set on fire to keep warm, much less wear on my feet. Having been foiled in our quest for trainers we went to the next shop along. As the name of the Payless Store had been very honest about the stuff it sold, imagine my concern as we entered this next shop which was called Dicks! Thankfully, it was a sport shop. I did note a subtle difference to JD Sports in that a sign on the door requested that all guns should be left at Customer Services.

Louise tried on a few pairs of trainers, chose the most expensive ones available and we were on our way. But no, Louise spotted a discount women’s clothes shop and we ended up in there for the best part of an hour looking at bras. This morning was not as much fun as you might imagine it to be if you were told you’d be spending your time with Dicks and bras. To top off the fun, we trotted round Target to for more “bits” which included (for some reason I wrote this down) sugar and another bra.

We got back to the villa at 10.45. Amazingly everyone was ready. I walked out again, convinced I’d walked into the wrong villa.

We left at 11.15 and parked in Hook 77. Upon boarding the tram Emily shared her pleasure with the concept of mornings.

Others seemed more awake.

As we left the tram Rebecca had to restroom but at least she had the decency to know how wrong this was and apologise for her weakness. This did mean that we missed the ferry boat that had been docked invitingly for us as we left the tram. So we had a ten minute wait for the next one.

This allowed me ample opportunity to take some photos of the new cabin things at the Poly.

You may, I will admit, find better photographs of these elsewhere on the internet.

Running out of things to photograph, I was pleased that the boat turned up and we boarded.

We waved at folks on the other boat, and soon enough completed the crossing.

Main Street never gets old and I feel compelled to take (the same) photos whenever I set foot on it.

However, I do like the last two, with both the girls with Minnie Ears in front of the castle. I told you my photos were vert artsy.

Our first stop was at a FastPass+ kiosk outside Stitch. This is the closest you will ever find me to this “ride” as it is an abomination and should be killed with fire. I was trying to see if we could add/swap any of our FastPasses for today as they weren’t our ideal selections. Nothing was available so we were advised to come back once we’d used one of our currently booked ones.

We then made our way over to Be Our Guest for our lunch reservation. I’m pretty sure this was meant to be a photo of the Mine Train ride and not a very poor attempt at photographing Louise.

I checked in with a flash of my Magic Band and we were told to join the queue. Surely, the definition of a reservation was to not have to, but hey ho, join we did. Now, the last time we dined here was for dinner and it was truly one of the best experiences we have had at WDW. The theming was incredible, the service great and the food as good as can be expected in a theme park. After we had eaten we had left to an empty (closed) Magic Kingdom and had a lovely stroll out to the exit taking loads of photos and enjoying the peace and quiet.

Often when you try to recreate something like that it is doomed to failure, but Sarah and Nana and Grandad hadn’t been and we felt we should give it a go for them. However, a lack of knowledge on my part with some stupidity thrown in for good measure was to lead to what was a bit of a disappointment.

So this queue went on for an age and I had no idea why. We were given a menu in the queue and eventually once at the front, realised that there were a set of kiosks at which we were to enter our order before we found a table. I honestly had no clue lunch service was like this, so that’s my own lack of research, but I didn’t feel great about it.

Ordering in this manner for seven people is not the easiest task in the world, plus, as we’ve established over the years, I’m stupid. So as we got to our table and our sandwiches (that’s pretty much all you can get) arrived, we were missing one…mine. Yep, I had been so intent on making sure everyone had ordered theirs, I forgot to do my own. So I had to go back to a kiosk and ask the CM if I could sneak in and order one more, which of course they let me do.

The theming of course was still lovely…

However, by the time I had ordered mine and got back to the table everyone else had finished. Again, I know this is my own fault!!  Drinks were obtained from a McDonalds style dispenser and the whole thing was a bit like eating a football match. Had I known lunch was done in this way we probably would not have bothered. My own incompetence apart with the ordering cock up the whole thing felt incredibly mass market (yes, I know I’m in a theme park, but I know it can be done better than this….cos Disney do it!).

Add to all this that Louise’s beef sandwich arrived still mooing and had to be sent back, and we can declare this not to be our favourite dining experience to date.

I can however confirm that this stuff is indeed delicious.

We did a few photos as we left…

and headed over to Jungle Cruise for our first FastPass. It was very, very hot which meant that Louise declined the ride in favour of sitting in the sun. The rest of us boarded our second boat of the day.

I had to record the back side of water of course.

Our captain was good, but not the best we’ve had. It got a bit wet, but luckily I had some trunks to hand.

As we had done Small World yesterday we changed our FastPass for it now to Buzz. Yes, we did that one yesterday too, but Small World is a labour of love and need not be repeated. Plus, I had pride and revenge to seek out score wise.

Our next FastPass was for Peter Pan. Alas we were too early to ride so we went to get a drink at Pinocchio’s place. We sat outside under some brollies in the incredible heat letting our sweat run freely wherever it wanted to.

Soon enough, we could do Peter Pan, which funnily enough was something often heard when Jim Davison was in pantomime.

Next, we wandered over to Tomorrowland, with some clouds threatening to add to our moistness. It was so humid that frankly I was willing the heavens to open.

In need of some air con and a sit down we decided to go into Carousel Of Progress for both.

Grandad was asleep in seconds but the rest of us sang along like all normal folks are compelled to.

We had a look around the Merchant of Venus shop next and Emily got some sunglasses to avoid her looking so squinty in every photograph. At this point Grandad’s God Shoes (he meant to say Jesus Sandals but once he’d called them God Shoes once, the name stuck) broke. The strap at the back was hanging off and he was now hobbling around trying not to lose it! In an attempt to take his mind off that we went into the Laugh Club.

Rebecca was featured in the pre-show where they show audience members on the screen which delighted her almost as much as it pleased Emily, as it meant it wasn’t her up there. How two daughters raised identically by the same parents can be so different is mind blowing.

After another enjoyable show here we went next door for our recently acquired FastPass for Buzz. I scored a much more respectable 293,000. Louise left claiming something around 500,000, which frankly I didn’t believe.

Space Mountain had a wait beyond our tolerance, so we decided to step out of the crippling heat for a little while by venturing over to a monorail resort for a drink and a sit down. The Contemporary was the nearest so we ended up there, up in the Outer Rim bar.

We were all glad of the cool and the comfort.

I contemplated important things like the meaning of life, why I have more than one chin and why I gave Louise the camera.

The girls sat a suitable distance away from us so as not to be linked in any way to Grandad’s broken God Shoes.

We had a couple of rounds of drinks including beers and cocktails as the promised rain came down in some style. After two hours and a growing bar bill there was no sign of it stopping so we ditched the plans we had to go back into the park and headed for food and home in that order.

To prevent us getting drenched on the way I handed out the ponchos I had stuffed into Ryan earlier. It was a nice touch to find these in the garage at the villa saving us multiple dollars! What I didn’t know was that one of them was a child’s size and Sarah got that one. What followed was a hilarious few minutes as she tried to put it on only to have it stuck over her head for about two minutes whilst the rest of us laughed supportively.

Here she is, once again, able to breathe.

We got the monorail out to the TTC where it was as damp as we had expected.

We headed towards the villa not knowing where we would eat. I spotted a Black Angus at the junction of the 192 and our turning onto Old Lake Wilson Road and suggested that. We had a great meal at one of these back in 2004 or 2005, so of course that guaranteed the same tonight!

I did the gentlemanly thing and pulled the car right up to the door to let everyone out before I went off to park, knowing I would be soaked by the time I sat down to eat. As everyone was piling out I felt a bump and the whole car rocked. It turned out a chap reversing out of the disabled spot by the door had hit us. He was very apologetic and as no damage could be seen at all and more to the point it was absolutely pissing it down, we didn’t feel the need to get his details and we let him drive off, with him expressing his thanks.

My notes on what everyone had are patchy, but here goes.

Me and Emily – Southern Fried Chicken and Mash

Grandad – Steak (detailed, I know).

Nana – Burger

I have no clue what was had by everyone else but it all seemed to go down pretty well. Rebecca was struggling a bit with women problems so she didn’t eat that much and was a bit quiet and grumpy. With that in mind and our dampness this meal won’t go down in the history books as one to remember but it was fine.

We paid $160 and ventured out again into the rain. I ran to get the car and avoided any further collisions as everyone boarded at the door. The rain intensified as we drove home and the lightning was incredible. We were home and in bed by 10.

Till the next time…..

The Adults Only Tour 2015 – Day Two

Day Two – Friday 28th August

Ah, the traditional first day ritual of waking up at a time nobody should know about, especially those on their holidays. Imagine my delight at being so only because somebody phoned me at 4.23am. Who knows how long I may have slept on for….maybe even all the way until half past!

I ignored the call of course, but then saw a voicemail had been left, so I thought I’d better see what it was in case I’d won the lottery or the UK’s sexiest male again. The call was from my bank. It would seem that I had gone overdrawn, and several payments presented were about to be refused and they suggested I got in touch. This did seem odd to me as today was pay day, and as pricey as the airport breakfast was, my wage should be covering most of that.

I got online and found that my account was sadly missing any form of salary payment for me which was, as you can imagine, a mild concern. Eventually I called the bank and explained that, as I had discovered with a bit of googling, HSBC were having all sorts of trouble sending payments and my employers happened to bank with them. It would appear that my salary payment was stuck in some HSBC pipe somewhere and would be in my account in due course.

The bank chap said he knew about the HSBC issue. So that was all sorted then surely? I had been with my bank since 1987 and never missed a payment to anyone and he could see right in front of him how much I got paid each month and from whom it came. Imagine my chagrin as he went on to say that if I did not pay in that day then all the payments presented would be returned and I would be charged.

Put it down to the lack of sleep if you like, but the next couple of minutes were a bit like the clip from Pulp Fiction…you know the Samuel L Jackson soliloquy? I pointed out that I was overseas and therefore unable to “nip into a branch” to pay in. I also outlined my disgust at his lack of understanding of one of their “black” customers. This was not a racial comment. I have a “special” account with them reserved for those with enough stupidity to pay a monthly fee for it to supposedly get some sort of personal service.

Bollocking somebody at a whisper, so as not to wake anyone else up, from 4000 miles away is a new skill, but I mastered it quite quickly. The call ended with a promise of paying everything and no charges being made. It turns out my salary hit my account later that day and all this nonsense was for naught. Sigh. OK, on with the holiday.

With zero chance of getting back to sleep I got some orange juice from the fridge and settled down to watch some adverts on the telly.

Around 6am I began the task of waking everyone else up. There was no way I was going to be up from 4.20 and not be at a park for opening. I started with the girls, predicting them to be the most painful but when I went back into my bedroom, Louise let off a tirade of abuse not seen since my call with the bank. Having woken her I retreated to the lounge once again, leaving her to come around. When I ventured back in some minutes later the reason for her foul mood was that the clock next to her side of the bed was wrong and it read 4.30am rather than the now 6.30am. How we laughed!

It took until 7.38 (precisely) to be out of the villa. I took up, what would become my customary position by the alarm panel waiting for everyone else to get out so I could set it. The really funny part of this EVERY DAY was just as I thought everyone was finally out on the drive and I pressed the button to set the alarm, someone would come back in, apologising that they had forgotten something. Again, how we laughed…each and every time.

Still, this was not a bad time to be out and heading for the Magic Kingdom. We breezed out of the villa development and onto the main road up to the 192. We turned right and we were immediately greeted with stationery traffic and this….

I have to admit to having a slight mood on at this point. The world was conspiring against me at every turn in my quest to have some fun. I will not have it be said that there are greater problems in the world! With the bank stress and now this I had half a mind to set the sat nav for the airport and give it up as a bad job.

A long ten minutes of not getting very far passed and the traffic then eased. Whilst sat in the queue a large wasp had attached itself to Louise’s window. She loves wasps and did not jump about three feet into the air when she saw it.

Once calm again she grabbed the camera and took too many photos of it as our speed increased and it continued to hold on defiantly.

Louise’s ability to focus on entirely the wrong thing in a photo is impressive.

The wasp left us at the junction of the 192 and we took a right in the direction of World Drive. For many years, having stayed around Formosa and Lindfields we have usually taken the Sherberth Road route into the parks so entering the official opening was a novelty and something I vowed to continue in other areas of my life.

With Sarah with us, as a first timer, there was something quite correct about going under this sign on the way in.

We arrived at the Ticket and Transportation Centre at 8.10. This pleased me and offered some reward for the ridiculous speeds I was doing up World Drive. “But officer, it’s our first morning, I’m all excited and we were stuck behind a truck for ten minutes!”

Emily had a voucher for her short term park ticket (to cover the few days until she got her Cast Member one) so she and I went to a ticket window to swap that. I also collected a First Visit badge (they are NOT buttons) for Sarah and a Birthday one for Rebecca. Sure, her birthday was back in May, but this trip was part of her present and so celebrate we would.

No sane person takes the ferry boat on their first day, so a monorail journey and the first poking of my sack (Hello Ryan!) saw us stood outside the Magic Kingdom in time for the opening ceremony.

See, that phone is still there.

With the show done, the large crowd moved slowly into the park with us right in the middle of it. Eventually we got to the Holy Grail that is Main Street and took in the sights and sounds and the realisation that we were finally home again. It had been too long!

I expertly walked backwards taking snaps as we went. Stopping is for amateurs.

I think I have one of these shots from every year we’ve been!

The new hub looked lovely.

With Pirates closed, our natural left turn meant that we would be heading for either some Splash or some Thunder. This is pretty typical for me after air line food and it may take a few days to sort itself out.

As we passed Pirates we saw a group of new cast members on a tour of the park. It was funny to think Emily would be doing that in a few short days.

Splash it was.

It was a walk on and this first ride is always a special time. The endless possibilities of the holiday to come in your mind, the very real magic of one of the best rides in WDW and the near euphoria of finally being there after months of planning and anticipation.

As we left the ride Grandad declared that he needed the loo. This, frankly, was unacceptable behaviour after just one ride and I made my feelings clear on the matter. We would have to make those minutes up later from his own time.

Naturally, Thunder was next.

Nana declined to ride and again it was a walk on. Always fun and surprisingly fast.

Our natural Disney navigation systems took us down towards the Haunted Mansion now and as we arrived we saw a thirteen minute wait posted which we guessed meant a walk on.

It was a joy to see Sarah’s reaction to the stretching room and all the theming that is done so well. There had been a few changes in a recent refurb which were nice to see and the traditional stops during the ride of course happened too. I can hear the voice now telling me to remain in my buggy.

As we left the Mansion some weaker folks spoke of their need of a drink and sit down. There was clearly some form of mutiny happening but in the interests of cordiality I agreed. We went over to the snack place in Liberty Square and got a variety of stuff that I couldn’t be bothered writing down. I had a drink and a banana anyway. As we chatted an elderly Cast Member approached us and started to chat. He was called Fred and we spent a good ten minutes talking to him about all sorts of stuff. He asked how many times we’d been, which was a few more than him and he’d worked there for thirty-two years!

We spoke about Emily starting work and it being Sarah’s first time and he quizzed us a little too much it seemed on the make-up of our party. He seemed delighted when he learned that we were three generations of the same family, plus Sarah, a first timer. As we were making to leave (I’m sorry Fred, no matter how charming you are I can feel the queues getting longer) he said he had a question for us. Anywhere but a Disney park and I’d have been listening for banjo music and squealing pigs.

Would we like to take part in the parade this afternoon as Grand Marshalls?

Well, my smile gave him the answer immediately. Of course we would!! We were shocked, delighted and excited in equal measure. He told us where to be and when and said he would see us there later. We wandered off not quite sure what to make of the whole thing. In my dazed state even I went for a wee and then we somehow ended up in It’s a Small World.

Clearly Louise had the camera again.

Still a bit dazed we left the ride and someone else went for a wee. If we can’t co-ordinate our bladders better than this, it could be a frustrating holiday.

Philharmagic was next and we timed it perfectly, entering the holding area just as the doors opened. The show wasn’t full but this did not stop me having to be restrained by Louise as I went for those stopping half way down a row like some drunk outside a nightclub who has had his kebab knocked from his hands.

About half way through the show, starting to regather myself a little I suddenly remembered all this FastPass+ stuff I’d done many weeks ago. I checked my app and sure enough we had a FastPass for Buzz in a few minutes. I spent the last minutes of Philharmagic trying to calculate the distance to Buzz and the speed at which I’d have to get everyone moving to get there in time. We did our best but we arrived as a collective sweaty mess five minutes after our FastPass slot had ended. Looking at the forty minute standby queue I gave everyone a slap for not walking quickly enough. With our newly gained Grand Marshall status I figured it was worth trying to use the FastPass anyway and strode confidently to the pole thingy. I waved my ticket at it (we had not yet had time to get bands of magic) and it lit up and turned green. If your pole does that, see a doctor immediately.

Six more waves of tickets and we were all in.

The score on this ride is not the point at all. It is merely the fun of riding that counts.

As my planning skills are awesome, just as we left Buzz, with me scalding Emily for poor sportsmanship and gloating, our slot for Space Mountain rolled around. We made our way over and again minus a Nana, entered. This is me with the camera, but this is artsy and intentional, not out of focus.

My notes tell me someone else restroomed prior to Space. My disgust at that time did not allow me to document who.

This was a great ride. Having Sarah along meant that finally someone on it screamed louder than I did.

As we left the ride we took the chance to get our Magic Bands in the shop at the exit. It was painless yet expensive.

To allow some form of resting without actually resting, we boarded the people mover thing.

As ever, this was a nice breezy sit down.

There had been a disgusting lack of food so far today so we were due to remedy that right now with a buffet attack at the Crystal Palace. We wandered over past the castle, through the new hub area.

We were a little early, for probably the first and last time this trip, but I figured if they added together our lateness for Buzz and our earliness for lunch we’d be about right. We were. I checked in and more or less as soon as I had that thing in my hand it went off and we were taken to our table.

I was pretty restrained food wise to be honest. A little salad to start and just the one visit for “mains”, with no dessert. Listen, we’re here for eighteen days and if I go off at full tilt I’ll have to be winched out of the front of the villa by a reality TV show.

One clear disadvantage of a large touring party is that when characters appear, there are often multiple cameras in use. The girls want one for their phone(s) plus my Dad has his camera out and they are all competing with my official record of the event with the real camera. So what happens is this…

After all that food, a large Pooh was inevitable.

Then, back to the food.

Emily likes to look her best for the camera.

A rare shot of me and a rarer shot that is actually in focus from Louise.

Our server had fallen for our dastardly plan of pretending it was Rebecca’s birthday and brought her a nice cup cake. We all sang to her and were immediately condemned to eternal damnation for our evil deceit.

She also got a lovely card signed by the characters.

Eeyore turned up suitably late.

I’ve taken better photos. The one on Rebecca’s phone was no doubt great.

As an aside, here are the girls from way back in 2004 in more or less the same spot. Time does indeed fly.

image054

The bill was as sizeable as expected at $304. I was left all alone at the table to settle the bill whist everyone else buggered off to the shops. Once relieved of my wealth I caught them up during a traditional silly hat try on session.

By this time we had to make our way to meet Fred for our appointment with the parade. We wandered all the way back to Splash Mountain to the gate where the parade starts and ends from (either, not both). We were a little early and met Brian, our official photographer…I kid you not. He took some shots whilst we waited for Fred and started what would be the royal treatment from start to end.

Once Fred arrived we were given Mickey hats to wear and told that we’d have some free photos from Brian’s work to collect on Main Street later. We also got certificates to confirm our Grand Marshall status. He took us backstage to where our car was waiting for us and we climbed in.

We chatted with Fred and the driver until the other Cast Member with us shouted “Thirty Seconds” whilst touching her ear piece which was clearly just for effect! We were told to “smile and wave boys” for the duration and look out for Brian taking photos as we went.

Here we are doing as we were told.

A Dibber/blog reader had just spotted us and shouted “Where’s Ryan?” so I did the decent thing and showed them my sack. It was hard work smiling and waving for that amount of time but the whole thing was surreal and bloody marvellous. During the parade we had a few shouts from people who lived in Bolton or thereabouts. We were announced across the park as the Williams family and Sarah Prince from Bolton at regular intervals.

As we pulled into the backstage area at the side of City Hall we thanked everyone in a two-mile radius about twenty times.

We were then escorted to a roped off area right at the end of the parade route and we were told that Brian would continue to take photos as we watched the parade pass by. So we waited for the parade to arrive.

And here we are watching the parade. Thanks Hilary for pointing me at this vlog which captured us. We appear from around 5m 30 seconds in.

Be warned, there are a lot of parade photos.

We got up close and personal with some of the characters…sometimes a little too close.

See how Ariel delights in seeing me all sweaty in my tight T-shirt and attractive baggy shorts.

When it was over, we wandered, still shell shocked by the whole thing, to the photo shop. We viewed all the ones Brian had taken and choose our freebies to have printed there and then. We linked to rest to my MDE for viewing later.

Not sure how we’d top what had just happened, either today or ever again we made our way out of the park. This being Sarah’s first ever day in a Disney park, it may have set the bar a little too high!

We monorailed to the tram stop and we left our parking spot in Aladdin to make our way to the Publix supermarket close to our villa for yet more shopping. We got back to the villa at 5.15 and right on cue the rain came down. To be honest, we were beyond spent for today and we all just collapsed in various places of rest and I think I was asleep at about 7pm. What a day!

Till the next time…….

A £125 Pumpkin!

This week, dear reader I have failed you. I intended to be posting day one of the trip report about now, but alas it is not finished. That said, it is further along than the one paragraph I reported last week, but real life has been upsetting my rhythm all week and I have struggled to find the motivation and indeed time to get it done. If memory serves, about now we are over the Atlantic somewhere watching Granddad sleep and eating average food. That may not sound like much progress, but there’s a lot of words involved in getting us so far.

Not to make excuses, (but I will), I was away with work for two days and then I have had a double-header of gigs over the weekend. I need to retire really to give me enough time to do the things that work stops me from doing. There are so many hours during the week that are poured into activities I really have little interest in and they could be so much better spent on other things. Sadly, those other things do not earn me the money I need to do those other things. Life is a bitch and a huge Catch 22.

Louise and I have experienced our first week in an empty nest and to be honest we’ve both been so busy that I’m sure the change hasn’t hit us yet.  We have of course noticed small things like less noise, a smaller food shop and slightly less mess but I’m sure in the coming weeks it will hit us more forcibly. Hopefully all this won’t sink in for a while as I may just realise just how much I miss the girls and that probably won’t be a good thing. Emily too is feeling a little homesick over in Florida, despite enjoying herself amongst the parks, so if you do find yourself near the UK pavilion you have my permission to seek her out and give her a hug from us. A jaffa cake or two may also help.

Rebecca and Tom seem to have settled in well to their new home and they also seem incredibly happy, which is all you can hope for really. Tales of Rebecca cleaning a bathroom and tidying up leave us wondering if there has been some sort of body swap but long may that continue. She’ll be starting her new (first full-time) job shortly so she really is a big girl now!!

Last night, on the second night of our two date weekend world tour, we played at a local wedding. As you know, I am not one for the blowing of trumpets that are mine, but we are very good at them! It is always great to see a packed dance floor all night.

bleachworks 3-10-15

If you, or anyone you know is having a wedding, or any sort of party, then do get in touch for special Mkingdon discounts for your dash of Mustard. A live band makes such a difference to any event I think. Having watched many a “DJ” stand and press play on a compilation CD, there’s something a bit exciting about live music. (Advert over).

There are a couple of family members that I don’t often mention, mainly as I don’t like them. They are our two cats Pumpkin and Daisy. Cats, to me, are useless. They offer nothing to the household beyond an inside toilet and scratches on stuff you don’t want scratched. Pumpkin has been a bit unwell for a while and my approach of “she’ll be fine if we leave her long enough” was roundly ignored last week and Louise took her to the vet. One consultation, an injection and blood test later and we are handing over £125. Imagine our delight when the vet told us a few days later that the results of all that showed nothing amiss and her regular throwing up after eating may just be a reaction to her food. She then suggested that we should feed her chicken and fish for a bit to find out. Now, call me a cynic, but surely that advice should come before 125 quids worth of useless stuff? Safe to say my regard for the cats has not improved following this episode. If anyone wants to buy a cat for £125, I have a selection of two you can choose from.

By the way, you have no idea how much self-restraint it took to not have today’s post titled something about expensive pussy!

Earlier this afternoon I finally got around to looking at some of the photos we had taken of us when we were the Grand Marshalls of the afternoon parade in Magic Kingdom. We got a few free at the time but the rest are now online for us to choose from. I’ve ordered just a couple as the prices are typically Disney, but the whole experience was surreal and excellent so we should have some mementos of what will be a one-off experience. Hopefully they will arrive in time to include them in what will be day two of the trip report. Having said that, at my current pace of writing they could arrive at Christmas and still be in time! I won’t steal any more of my own thunder by saying much more about it here other than we felt honoured, delighted and a bit overwhelmed with how we were treated.

I won’t use the word promise, but I will try my very best to have the first day ready for next Sunday, as it will least save me having to come up with a post next week! 🙂

Till the next time…..