Warning – before you read this….
Don’t be worrying about me after this oblique and vague rant. This isn’t the equivalent of one of those “You OK hun?” Facebook posts. Some recent events (that will not be detailed here) have just got me wondering about how some people behave.
There’s an oft used saying that nice guys finish last. Outside of the bedroom, that saying is meant to be derogatory I suppose. It means that to be a success, or to “win” you have to be a nasty bastard. The fact I never have enough money to do the things I want to do means that I probably am not “winning”, and as such maybe I am a nice guy too. Do I finish last? Well, that would be telling, but in life I would say that I am consistently average to middling in all respects. There are certainly those worse off than me, and of course many more better off too. What I would say is that anything I do have is a result of honest graft, effort and persistence, rather than luck or dodgy doings.
I am contemplating this saying as today I have witnessed what I can only describe as c***tish behaviour of the highest order. I can’t and won’t go into detail here as the repercussions of it will rumble on for quite some time to come, but it has got me pondering a few things about the folks I share this planet with. It’s a theme I often visit and ponder, but rarely commit to writing.
Maybe it’s just that I’m not ruthless enough, maybe, to quote one of those knob head X Factor judges, I don’t “want it” enough. Maybe I trust that others operate with the same moral compass as I? This failure to annihilate anything and anyone that stands between me and my wants and desires means that I probably won’t get a good many of them. I don’t, for example, ignore the lane closed signs at road works and then expect with absolute certainty that someone will see my last minute use of the indicator as my God given right to be let in. I do sit a few cars back screaming at folks letting these self-absorbed ego ridden knob jockeys in, but it is all very impotent and useless. Indicate they do, and let in they are.
Is it breeding? Is this a result of your nurture, or are you born with a bad attitude and a penchant for late indicating? I don’t know, but without really thinking about it I do find that I do treat most folks the way I would wish to be treated. I have a high sense of justice and fairness and will moan a lot when I see someone ignoring either or both. I could give to charity more, in fact I could and maybe should be one of these folks that climb, swim and run things to raise money for those less fortunate, but frankly I don’t have the time or the inclination. I’d rather donate to a few times throughout the year and hope that makes me nice enough.
If you are like me then you do hope that at some point there is a totting up procedure, not so much for me to get my pat on the head and a gold star, but more for the roadworks ignoring ass and the like to get some form of payback or slap on the wrists. Alas, I fear that does not exist, and I am yet to ever see Karma be the bitch she is reported to be.
I’m a big lad and can and will deal with stuff as I always do but I just find myself wondering how when you behave in these ways do you sleep at night and feel at peace with yourself. Whether it’s someone pushing into traffic, not queuing for something or getting themselves ahead in some other manner, the rewards are there, so why don’t we all do it? Personally, I find I literally can’t. I have a long and deeply ingrained sense of playing by the rules I suppose, and get quite tetchy when someone does something that bends or breaks them. This kill or be killed, or look after number one above all else attitude grates a bit, although of course I can be a selfish arse at times.
Anywho, I’m also not a fan of these vague ranty posts on social media where no further details are given so all I will say now is that it isn’t life or death, won’t have a sizeable effect on our lives but just pisses me off that people behave in ways that I would never allow myself to.
In lighter news, I enter my last week at work before Christmas and then I shall luxuriate in two weeks off. As ever, I claim to be in dire need of the break, as we’ve have had a tiring, stressful and bumpy end to the calendar year. As I have fallen out with the world I may lock the front door, draw the curtains (we don’t have any so I’ll pull the blinds down) and just spend time with those people who aren’t likely to behave in ways of which I disapprove.
Being December, and the girls working in the restaurant biz, they are both very busy over the next few weeks. Extra shifts and extra pay will never be enough to convince Emily that working on Christmas Day is worth it, but she’s only in for a few hours and isn’t working at New Year. Rebecca has an enormous amount of work coming up, so she will be loaded for about eleven seconds when she gets paid. This is the length of time it normally takes her to spend every penny in her possession on essential items that she simply cannot live without.
So, with my beady eye cast out over a world that has some work to do to get back into my good books, I shall leave you to your own Xmas prep. I hope to be calling upon you soon to click, read and pretend you enjoy some stuff I’ve written for a large Disney site. I often call upon you to endure crap I’ve written and at the right time I shall be painfully insistent that you help me out this time. You have been warned. Be ready!
Right, I’ve finished now….not sure if I was last.
Till the next time…..